a little time to spend

Rolling like Boss, yeah!

2012-01-26T10:20:00.003-05:00

I believe, always that everything happened for a reason. It has been a while that I feel something is not right with my tire. It has always been the spare tire but during the trip last week to Pahang, I burst the tire. So I had the spare be replaced with my burst tire. Well, the tire had to be replaced and the rim had to be put of with some knockings. So the replaced burst tire with the knocked rim was put on standby as the new spare tire. But the spare tire that I had was not performing well. I believed there was a hole somewhere and I was right when I did the checking at Dwimaju tyre shop near Gombak just now.

First we discovered that the tire was in fact with hole which could not be simply patched because the hole is on the side. So I had to replace the tire. I agreed to change the tire with second hand Pirelli tire at 200 well the salesperson (a Bangla)said that it would cost 1000 for a new one. But then as they were replacing the tire they discovered that the rim is bent and cannot be simply knocked. Haiyya so they managed to persuade me to buy new rims at 3000 for 4 tires. They also persuaded me to buy a new Michellin tire for the two tires in front at a price of 320 each. Then later I had to add another 150 for the nuts which they claimed to be special and not easy to be taken out.

I have class starting at 6.30 pm but then they did not have the rims at the shops so they had to take the rims from their other stores. I was moody at them. Then the boss came taking one their salesperson to take the stocks of the rims at their another store. Well the boss is also a Bangla driving a Mercedes.

After they brought in the rims from the other shops, the boss need to fetch me around to withdraw some cash. The boss was (for a while) my driver chauffeuring me around in a Mercedes to withdraw money from an ATM machine at PETRONAS.

Then he told me that his business is actually owned by Hishamuddin the Cabinet Minister, of course, he would not want any name of his to appear in any business. Through this Bangla, he run the shops as well as other businesses. The Bangla who is the boss of the other Bangla chauffeuring me is Aminuddin. He's 33, just got married last two years with a beautiful lady who was the daughter of a Datuk which he was a workers for that Datuk for many years. Alas, I forgot to ask the name of the Datuk.

My mood improved, after being chauffeuring like a boss. I paid them 3650 in total after some bargaining.

I arrived class a bit late, around 7.15pm and few minutes later Nora Elena entered the class sitting next to me. Just my lucky day. Then we formed group along with Intan and Rohaya.

First day at mission E.Y. seems really positive. I hope I will continue to be awesome and be able to end E.Y. mission with success.

Unexpected love

2011-12-31T08:53:00.003-05:00

It seems that I always end my year with watching movies. Last year I ended the year watching 3 Idiots, an Indian movie about life and ambitions. Well, this year, I just finished watching two movies back to back, both American entitled Just Go It (which was hilarious, Adam Sandler and Jennifer Anniston were damn funny!!!) and Life As We Know It (Holly and Messer had to take care of orphaned Sophie).

Both movies ended with the discovery of true love out of the ordinary life. They were forced to foster their true unexpected love due to extenuating circumstances.

I am ending this year failing my KPI to find love. It may have been a blessing in disguise. It is in year 2012 that I would be focusing to find true love and propose someone into marriage.

Btw, I did not manage to see neither MA nor FST. Perhaps next year. Here I come, babes!!

A day and a night before 2012

2011-12-30T06:57:00.003-05:00

Tomorrow would be the last day of 2011. I would like to take this moment to reflect on things I have done this year.

I went to Singapore for the very first time in my life. Twice. Once during the Chinese New Year which was in February and the second one in November. One with my own money for holiday and the other was fully paid by my boss Mr LOOKS, well of course through the company. Singapore is different from Malaysia. Somehow it is more structured, organized and modern from KL.

I got a nephew. A girl. Born just few days before my birthday. I guessed she was my birthday gift for the year. Her name means The Clever Princess. I went to Muar on the very day she was born. In fact, I was the first to see her among the other family members.

I was rotated within the department. In fact there were movements inside the division. Some are promoted and some moved laterally.

I sent a simple letter on 1.1.11 to NJZ which she was touched. Then a postcard while I was in Singapore. I sent a postcard too to my family but it failed to arrive. She tried to send me postcard, but it never arrived. I tried to send her another small note, but it also never arrived. Then she came back in May but I didn't get to talk to her. I was frustrated since she never wanted to return my calls. Hence she lost me while I was at Langkawi. Again, the Langkawi trip was under the courtesy of Mr LOOKS.

I dated long long lost friend AA, it was the once and only time I got to see her. After that she refused to answer nor return my calls. I lost my hope thus she lost me at the second set of attempts to reach her. I let her go to her wonderland.

I did however managed to meet and date MA, she is young and fun. She has high expectation for her future. She will continue her studies next year to a rather far far land. She has the potential to be my one and only wife. Time will tell.

I managed to take four classes last semester. It made me really really busy. I had no weekends. Then my family came for school holidays. My schedule was so tight that my only interactions is with my family, my co-workers and my classmates, not my other friends. I failed to show up to various events which fall on weekends. My MBA is almost over. I am left with one more class to take. Estimated completion date is sometime in March. Then the graduation ceremony will be held sometime in October. I am now eyeing for another Masters Degree in the UK. Chevening just opened up the application for sponsorship.

A day before my last final exam, I danced on the same stage as Atilia and her band after being interviewed by Linda Onn. I believed that I performed poorly on the final exam as my mind wandered still on the event of the other night.

It was during the last semester that I got rather close with FST. She sat next to me in almost all the classes that she had with me. I tested her and I believed that she had crush on me. I am going to call her tomorrow, which I had indicated earlier to her, to arrange for a meet up. It has been really a while since we meet. Tomorrow too, I may be seeing MA again at a wedding of our mutual friends. I had promised Eddy to go with him. I'll call him first then FST to arrange for the meetings.

Many of my friends got married. I lost count. And I am becoming lazier to give a damn about showing up for the weddings. I am yet to find someone to marry next year. MA is unavailable since she will be going to further her study. FST may be available. I will see how compatible we are when I meet her tomorrow or Sundays. I need to make a call, fast.

My beautiful mind

2011-12-20T07:47:00.003-05:00

There are times when I feel strongly about doing something but when the time comes for implementing it, I am reluctant. Perhaps I am thinking too much, objecting ideas that were once brilliant. Mind play. My mind is beautiful. It is as if there are many people inside my head. One people would suggest me do something, but then there are many more objecting it. However there are times when the majority agreed on suggestions. Perhaps this is what we called the conscious mind.

The conscious mind acts like an ideal working government. There are oppositions as well as backbenchers who support the initial suggestion made by the prime minister. Then there are debates on the initial ideas, until a decision is made on whether the suggestion would be approved or rejected. The body will then act accordingly.

Impressive those who can make decision so quickly, such as footballers, badminton players and other athletes who competes with other people. They are in my opinion the most brilliant people in the world. It is as if their CPU i.e. brain processing speed is much faster than others.

Looking at another perspective, professors and other geniuses of the same department, are also brilliant in their mind. They have the stamina to focus and think at a problem for so long until they find the solutions. Amazing.

Always looking for new challenges

2011-09-24T07:00:00.002-04:00

Would it be very bad to pretend asleep when you're not. To pretend that you're not home when people are calling your name outside. But I am trying to abstain food as hard as I can. Perception is what matters most. If you can create the atmosphere of feel good. There shouldn't be practically a calamity of coming back to earth.

I always fall into the trap of judging a book by its cover. I have learnt that some books with interesting cover may not be interesting at all. Likewise, some books which seems dusty, uninteresting are actually very captivating with knowledge beyond boundaries. I am trying to be open minded now, approaching all types of books, reading them and trying to know them personally. Only then will I be able to make knowledgeable decision about things which are in reality the most important thing in my life.

There are many choices when buying a car. The best thing to do is to test drive them all. Some dealers are friendly and will take the extra mile to make you feel good. Some are just blatantly stupid to ignore you while they know that we are potential buyers!

The experiment starts now

2011-09-24T06:57:00.004-04:00

I am making an experiment to see the behaviour of people towards beauty. Can beauty alone attracts people, man especially? Well, the hypothesis is that we will see few request in the coming days. How will they get connected? Through words of mouth of course.

First day of Ramadan in Year 2011

2011-08-01T05:55:00.002-04:00

Hello world. It has been really a while since I fast. To really really fast is not to eat and drink from dawn to dusk. For a muslim, the dawn is marked by the azan (the call for prayer) of subuh prayer. It is not obligatory but strongly encouraged to eat just before the dawn and stop 10 minutes before the azan, sort of like a breakfast to prepare the body for the journey ahead. Then, the dusk, when the breaking of fast is permitted when the azan for maghrib is being called. Depending on where you are in the world, the duration of fasting may vary from place to place. As such, at any time of the day in the world, azan can be heard somewhere in the world, due to timing difference from one place to another.

Today, in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, the beginning of fasting, as mentioned is during the azan of subuh, which happened today at 5.51 am. And the breaking of fast will be during the azan of maghrib which will occur at 7.30 pm. Therefore, today I will be fasting for 13 hours and 45 minutes, since I stop eating before dawn, at 5.45 am, i.e. few minutes before the azan of subuh. The practice to eat before dawn that I am encourage to do is called "sahur". While the practice of breaking the fast is called iftar. Many of the unfamiliar terms mentioned is in Arabic words, with slightly different spelling as compared to other writings.

It is almost half past six in the evening. I am alone at the back of the office waiting for iftar. I am planning to break the fast at the nearby mosque which at times like this prepare food for people like me. I am not feeling hungry typing. Just now when everyone was here, it has been a mixed feeling. Talking and laughing has resulted in slight realization of hungriness and thirstiness.

I am one man without anyone waiting for me at home at this moment. My parents is overseas while my sister is 3 hours drive from here. She is married with one daugther. I am always with one mission to find a wife, for the rest of my life.

eventful week? perhaps

2011-07-29T08:42:00.002-04:00

the week has not ended but yet so many events i'd like to remember

1-went to the match msia vs singapore at bukit jalil last night. msia lost in aggregate while scoring 1-1.

2-last Wednesday when there are so few people at the office, went to a mini date with zeeeha. sth i've been always dreaming of. we went to jalan hang jebat.

3-tonight resting

4-tomorrow will eat lunch and run at night. shapely run.

5-sunday for first taraweeh.

BERSIH Yet so dirty

2011-07-10T00:30:00.003-04:00

when the people of Thailand decided to go protesting by wearing yellow and red t-shirts, they collided and many stupid things happened. people got killed and many more were injured.

Yesterday, 9 July. some Malaysians were trying to emulate what had happened in Thailand. Luckily, the police was quick to act. They managed to contain the two groups or else the unthinkable would happened. The yellow shirts were the BERSIH group while the red shirts were the PATRIOT led by Khairy Jamaluddin (KJ). Why would he advocate such an act of having another group wearing the red shirts? The simple logic is that when two groups of different ideology collided, in the tension of so many people, marching down the street, under the scorching sun, the two groups will bite each other off! And KJ being as stupid as he is, organized a coalition wearing red shirt to tell the world that there those who are against the yellow group, BERSIH.

I am against BERSIH. There are many people who are not with BERSIH. I am for a clean election but I do not conform to the way they were planning the world that they want a clean election. There are many other ways to communicate their ideas, peacefully!

So those who are not with BERSIH will not join them, marching down the road! Thus KJ need not show the world by organizing another ground to demonstrate on the street. Just stay away from BERSIH and people will know that you are not with BERSIH.

Truth be told, BERSIH is not really what it seems to be. It is not just a demonstration to demand for clean election. Do you think that it is so simple. There are more to see behind all the reasons. It may be just a decoy for something greater. Something greater for some people but the rest of the demonstrator are just tools that are being used.

Most people are puppet for few people who knows the greater agenda.

Think about it.

BERSIH, it is not just cleaning up. There are bigger plans which I and normal you will not know about. Only some will know, those who are behind it all.

The puppet master - the controller of all puppets.

It could be anyone, US, Jews, CIA, etc. who knows.!

Salary at PETRONAS

2011-07-07T08:43:00.002-04:00

Truth be i told, there a lot of reasons to be working at PETRONAS. its working condition is not as different as any other companies in Malaysia. Yet, the starting salary is RM 4000 for fresh graduate and additional 500 if you have the critical technical competencies. Its medical benefit is among the easiest to use with the widest coverage. You'll be given an AIG insurance card which can be used at almost all clinics. Truth be told, you can always negotiate your salary if you have the edge to do so. Try to be different and stand out.

Truth be told, you'll be lucky if you've a wife working for PETRONAS, because the medical benefits also cover the husband, unlike most companies. Yet PETRONAS has the policy that husband and wive should not be PETRONAS employees. If you do decide to get married, when you are both PETRONAS's employees, you will be transferred so far away unimaginable. So you can safely assumed that the chances are high to find single ladies at PETRONAS.

p/s: I am not working for PETRONAS nor does having any affiliate. I did try to become a PETRONAS scholar but was rejected at the earliest stage. Nevertheless, I am a loyal PETRONAS petrol user.

Permanent Head Damage (PhD)

2011-06-20T09:36:00.007-04:00

It has been a while since I last saw or interact with her. It was last sunday while I was running an errand at a mall when I saw somewhat a familiar face. She was sitting down at a restaurant, not waiting for anyone but the waiter. I approached her and asked, "hey, how was studying?" "dude! i never thought PhD is sooo hard! I am burning my brain out!" Then she held her plate to me, "dude, you wanna eat this?"

"whoa," i said, "take it easy, babe!"

suddenly..

she threw her fork at me. with such a force that it penetrated into my cheek! i was bleeding profusely.. unable to keep my consciousness, i fell onto the floor.

i was dead for few hours before they surged me with the highest voltage possible.

thank God I do not suffer any permanent injury but she.. she suffer permanent head damage while attempting her PhD.

=P

Life and planning ahead

2011-06-19T01:28:00.002-04:00

Plan changes, because you never know what will happen tomorrow.
I always change my plan. I change when I acquire more knowledge. When you have more information, you can plan better. The better you plan, the more ready you are to face the challenge in the future. With proper planning, you can even be prepared for something unexpected. You are calm when faced with surprises. Because in your planning you have not one way of going forward, but you are prepared with options for different scenarios. You will never be accused of over-planning. But let's not deter any progress of moving forward by thinking too much. Thinking too much that you are afraid stepping forward because you are trying to visualize all possibilities of stepping forward and not stepping forward. So let us not be confused with "planning" and "thinking too much". Yes, planning need some thinking but not to the extend you are procrastinating everything. You have to be quick in making scenarios and let some thoughts go away.

I am an engineer. I plan to become an engineer since I was a student at secondary school. I ruled out medic since I have never been comfortable with bloods and cutting anything that is living (or even some dead animal such as frog). I never have the complete information of what I can be when I grow. All I can think of is that I want to build things and so I must become an engineer. Yet even when engineers build things, they are not usually doing something spectacular, most engineers are just designing based on available designs. Well, I think i am saying something wrong, so let's not continue about what engineer is doing.

When I was an engineering student, I realized that all the theories being taught are too complicated. Most of us end up memorizing rather than understanding.

Wait.. I am digressing..

What I wanna is say that plan can change. It's ok to steer into different direction when you gain more knowledge. Life is about learning. You may not know what you really want to do in life. But it's ok. Life is about trying. If you do not try then you will never know. You may not want to believe everything people tell you. What they experience may be totally different from your own experience.

I am now an engineer but now I am doing an MBA. I am interested with financial engineering. Learning how money is being manipulated by the west. Perhaps, I would like to do a PhD in Financial Engineering, win a Nobel prize for creating a formula that can eradicate interest in common financial instruments. I would like to be writing at the wall street journal. Perhaps, I should begin writing there first before applying for PhD at a prestigious university in UK or US. After all they are the king of manipulators.. creating money out of nothing.

Interest rate to slow down the economy

2011-06-13T08:43:00.004-04:00

from the depth of my mind, the mind speculates.

economy: the interest rates are going up, meaning that the cost of borrowing will increase, making purchases of things less affordable. this is a sign that the central bank is applying a slight force to slow down the economy. this is done to ensure that inflation would not take place as too many people afford to buy houses, cars and other things while, at the same time encouraging people to save money. (as the cost of borrowing increases, so does the profit from saving money in the bank). people who deposit money in the bank are technically the lender.

why is this happening? prices of things especially houses are going up too quickly because demand exceeds supply. and the gap between the demand and supply is growing at a fast rate.

will the bubble explodes? not in the near future. the central bank is taking the right decision to slow down inflation. i speculate that the interest rate will continue to increase eventually, as the demand for houses keep on increasing. with the help from banks, an average joe with a salary of RM 3000 can manage to buy a house amounting to RM 400,000. if no proper mechanism to screen affordability are in place, then even those who cannot afford to pay the monthly installment will be approved to buy a house beyond their means. causing the bubble to burst.

inflation is on the rise as the value of basic goods getting more expensive. the electricity tariff has just gone up. while the tariff hike does not introduce shock to consumers using less than RM 77 worth of electricity, they will eventually feel the effect through the increase of other products, as these commercial users of electricity will incur more cost due to tariff hike.

purchasing parity will go down. meaning that with the same amount of ringgit, you can buy less items that you used to do a while back. implying that the value of ringgit has gone down. so what is not being affected by inflation? GOLD. the same amount of gold can be used to buy a goat during the times of Prophet Muhammad SAW as you can do it today.

but the futures price of gold is lower than the spot market price of gold. why? because market expects that the supply of gold cannot be promised in the future. gold is becoming too valuable in the future that people believe that no price today can guarantee the delivery of gold.

Ahhh how time flies.

2011-06-06T08:20:00.002-04:00

nowadays, the time feels shorter and shorter each day. today i tried to fill in my claim form but to no avail. the day ended without me doing anything really. just talking with friends, surfing the web and read some articles. the banging sound in the building due to some construction works being done also inside the building exaggerate my unwillingness to do any work, not forgetting Monday blues.

how time flies. only 4 classes left this semester.

i really don't know how to approach her. i don't want to lose her..

the more I see it the more resemblance I am feeling

2011-06-04T10:33:00.003-04:00

OMG. i am feeling more confidence of looking at her. but never yet a word was spoken. somehow the lips are glued together whenever I was passing through.

She's not really photogenic. In real life she is way more beautiful. Her resemblance to Nora Elena is taking more and more shape every time I look at her.

Timing is vital. I don't want to make an awkward moment by teasing her.

Perhaps next week will be something to look forward too. It's midterm exam and I will be sitting at the very back so I can look at her. =D

I won't call back, NJZ.

2011-05-22T07:25:00.002-04:00

I am not sorry not to call back.
I think I know too well what you want to say.
You want to say sorry you did not call back.
You want to say you're overwhelmed.
You want to say how you have been too busy.
You want to say how much you want to talk to me.
You want to say that you regret not doing this and that.
But you lost me at Langkawi.
So I guess that would be your last call.
And I won't be available for you.
For the eternity that I am seeing.
So long and have fun there.

Seizure I saw

2011-05-17T06:45:00.003-04:00

Yesterday, Monday 16 May 2011. The day I that I thought I could relax and go fun n easy. Nonetheless, the morning started with urgent meeting by Dato Azman and I had to take the minutes. It was a quick meeting discussing updates on such events that are happening today. Dato Azman was on leave so he left immediately after the meeting. I, had to gather the strength to venture for the rest of the day. Well, I finished the minutes and sent to the PA of Dato Azman for endorsement.

Well the went quite normal as any other working day until around 4.20 pm. I went a colleague place to chit chat as it is more than 4 pm and I need some refreshment from mundane work. So there he was sitting at his place typing on his keyboard but i was not really looking at him as someone else appeared from the pantry that i needed to apologized since i missed her wedding invitation. suddenly i heard my friend/colleague producing a strange sound, some sort of hissing sound from him like gasping for air straight into his lung. I looked at him aghast, he was having spasm, his hand, his face were experiencing sudden contraction, his eyes were rolling up, his jaw was jerking looking as if he was experiencing pain but he was not responding to my talking, suddenly he was pushed backwards, sort of standing up due to his leg stretching out pushing him away, backwards, against the cubicle wall, against the chair, he was falling down, sliding smoothly onto the floor and yet he was still spasming.

He was on the floor unconscious, yet his body was stiff, he was not responding to my shouting, so I panicked and asked for help, two ladies that I was talking to shouted for help. It was a panic mode for everyone, people were running, rushing to his cubicle. Another lady called the ambulance. Few men went to his side, asking for water and then wiped his face with water. They called his name and he started to regain consciousness, acknowledging the people around him.

The medical team arrived. Took his blood pressure which was high at 160. By then he was awake, the ambulance was outside. The medical team asked whether he had experience seizure before, so I called his brother and asked, while telling him what happened. So this was his first time having seizure.

We took him to the ambulance. He tried to walk on his own, asking for his stuff i.e. glasses, phone and wallet. But he was not fully himself, he seemed lost, not knowing what had happened, he was not walking straight, he looked dizzy so we put him on a chair - normal office chair with wheel - and pushed him to the ambulance.

We took him to the nearest hospital which is only few minute drive. His brother managed to arrived at the hospital at the same time we arrived at the hospital. He was admitted to the emergency room. He was awake and dumbfounded. He did not remember anything since 4 pm. The last thing he remembered was walking towards the office, but did not remember that he had ever entered the office or sat in his cubicle.

The doctors are still figuring out what's wrong with him. They confirmed that his brain is ok. I suspected that he did not have enough rest. Too tired. Just too tired. Like a computer that has been running for so long that it hang. Then it restarted. Ergo, explaining the few minutes of his lost memory. Just like a computer that hang, some unsaved work become lost forever.

The long distance relationship that did not work

2011-04-25T06:03:00.003-04:00

For few months, NJZ and me has been trying with no avail to nurture a long distance relationship. Before that, we manged to get together for few times for couple months before she flew off to continue her study. The main reason I believe is that none of us are able to satisfy each other solely with communication other than face to face. When you are far away and all you can hear is the voice and see a face but it not the same as being together physically. Worst is communication through email or chatting because what we want to say is always being misinterpreted. Also, the technology that I used is not on far to established a pure satisfaction in terms of intimacy. We grew tired of not being able to express ourselves freely. We grew tired of having misinterpretation. We grew tired of not having the other person not online when one person was excited to talk or to communicate. The tiredness grew into frustration. I sent her a note which arrived succesfully. My postcard also managed to reach her safely. But her postcard to me never arrived to me till today. She was frustrated and depressed. I did not know how to assure her, to make the postcard arrive to me. Perhaps I failed to show how much care through words that was written or through words that came through my mouth. I only wish that I can be with her and hug her tightly or just listening while looking at her eyes.

the most important in a relationship that i discover is the importance of giving love (by man) and receiving love (by woman). since that is something i can't keep up with due to technology limitation, time differences, etc. the relationship has to end, hopefully with grace by both sides.

Nudibranch = Love

2011-04-23T09:39:00.002-04:00

The picture is taken from http://science-by-paddy.blogspot.com/2008/05/nudibranchs.html

and also if you would like to read more about that beautiful creature, do surf on the above website.

the concept of nudibranch of love has been introduced to me by my first love, SZZR. right now i am looking for love. love that can light up the darkness inside the heart. love that can complete the incomplete feeling of myself. something is missing deep down inside my heart, the last puzzle, the piece that i am looking for. next week kate middleton will officially become the princess of England. The royal wedding will be shown live at CNN this friday.

not that it matters to me. i can care less if anyone wants to marry anyone else right now. the feeling of numbness inside me can only be cured if i can marry someone i can truly love, with my dearest heart. i am ready to assume the responsibility of a perfect lover. however, i am still searching. no girl right now has been given the key to the innermost side of my heart. it is still locked. NJZ has only managed to reach the garden. so does SZZR while SZM were only standing at the driveway going to the garden. the door is still locked and i hope to open it anytime.

i am looking for love with an open heart, yet the innermost side of my heart is still locked. irony. i hate to have the thought of waiting for love that may never exist so i will move to fast lane with smarttag at my hand.

i am nudibranch. sliding through the bottommost part of the ocean. looking at people from underneath it all. so that i can see with greater perspective. i have ruled out several criteria because i know it will never work with me and i need to keep on reminding myself that it will never work, don't even bother to try:
1. girls older than me
2. girls with dark complexion
3. girls who are overweight
4. girls who are too short
5. girls that are too fragile, too thin
6. girls with very soft voice that i have serious problem listening to her
7. girls who are passive
8. girls who smoke
9. girls that are too sexy, showing her sexy pictures on the net
10. girls with angry face
11. girls who are scary
12. girls with love handles that are too obvious
13. girls who smell bad
14. girls with too obvious mole on her face
15. hairy girls
16. passive girls
17. girls that laugh too loudly and too much

What Women Look in Man

2011-04-21T09:46:00.002-04:00

I have been going through several stages in relationship and been seeing some pattern on all girls. Well, I do spent many of my times observing the behavior of people especially of the opposite sex, i.e. to me is female. Sometimes, I do things out of norms to see reactions of females to some sort of male behavior. No matter how confidence a female can be, deep down inside they are looking for a male companion who will make plan for them. Female loves it when male does all the planning, at times when she can relax and let all things flow. She want it to be made special, not having to decide and worry about things.

Undeniably, a male that does the planning for a female have the three main attributes:
1. confidence
2. purposeful
3. responsible

Girl/Lady/Woman loves it when man have all the three attributes. It is up to you to imagine why female looks for the three items above.

La Tahzan - Don't be sad (do not be bothered)

2011-04-03T11:05:00.001-04:00

it is no use to be annoyed or be sad or be mad or be jealous when AHA call her sayang. do remember the phrase ignorance is a bliss. the more you don't know the less you know about the truth that may hurt or send some uneasiness towards the feelings. if nothing unknown then what is known remains as it is as if nothing really happen and the thought that you have is as you imagine.

so let's get on with the original plan ignoring the calling of sayang by AHA. then I will go by the original plan, that is to let this thing move as it is now until november this year. after we will move on to the next target. but while at it we or rather I should be always on surveillance in order to identify the next best thing.

class will be starting in another two weeks which I hope I will meet new people new faces that are interesting and lovely experience awaits.

so don't bother, if it is meant to be then it will mean to be. so nothing changes.

I am hungry because I work a lot (Newborn)

2011-04-03T05:01:00.003-04:00

There is a relationship between the metabolism rate of your body and the amount of food you eat and the outcome of your appearance. Some people I know will stay skinny even though they eat a lot. While some are sitting on a bench not eating, doing nothing but are fat. I eat when I am hungry. I am hungry every 3 to 4 hours. I am fat now because I follow my instinct religiously.

I have been to places yesterday.

Sepang - Muar - Ampang : a new family member was born : 2 April 2011.

Her name means a clever queen. She had trouble yesterday to breast feed. She's so small and fragile. Weighing 2.6 kg when she was conceived.

So I bought ticket today for mom to come here next week. While commemorating my birthday. When the real purpose of course is to look at her first grandchild.

So my sister was alone at the ward last night because no one is allowed to stay with her after 7.30 pm.

But today everything's ok. She's discharged and resting at home.

Nuclear Power Plant Will Evolve

2011-03-17T08:46:00.002-04:00

In reality, nothing is safe. Driving a car to work may result in traffic accident. Walking down the street may result in being mobbed or hit by a vehicle. Eating may result in indigestion or stomachache. Jumping my cause the ankle to strain. Shouting may cause the voice to disappear. All things may lead to some sort of negative result if not being done properly or in a control manner. However, being a rational a person may always be, the above incident may not happen always, maybe sometimes.

The more dangerous actions or things are perceived as, the more careful the handling will be done. We are less careful when doing something that we do everyday like walking down the street. Sometimes we are too carefree that we do not look left and right when crossing the road. Oftentimes, we do not look down while walking assuming the roads are all even when in reality there could be a manhole being left open or nail sticking out waiting to pierce through our feet. Or driving a car, when are too used to it, we do not even wear the seatbelt. However we are more careful when doing things that we perceived as dangerous or risky such as bungee jumping. We want to make sure that the harness are tight and people who are maintaining the equipments are there to check on the equipments that you are wearing. Sometimes we insist that our equipments are being check twice or more times.

We are all well aware that nuclear bomb is dangerous, catastrophic. It can wipe out the whole city, Nagasaki and Hiroshima. Nuclear power plant can be dangerous, like Chernobyl, it turned an industrial city in Soviet Union to become a dead city with no activity that light up the city. We have heard about the latest incident in Japan, when the tsunami and the great earthquake hit Japan on the memorable Friday noon of 11-3-2011. Today we are looking at the catastrophic events relating the nuclear power plants of Fukushima Daichi. It was design for 6.3 Richter earthquake, yet all safety features managed to halt the reaction when the 9.0 Richter earthquake started to tremble the city of Sendai. It was supposed to be a smooth shutdown of the nuclear power plant had it not been for the unpredictable tsunami. The cooling system failed when the 13 feet tsunami wipe out all backup power source, be it the diesel generator, mobile generator, the power grid and the batteries. Due to the failure of the cooling system, the reactor overheated, even though the nuclear reaction has been stopped or at least left to the bare minimum. The reactor continue to heat and causes steam built-up inside the reactor. The super hot steam coupled with unknown reaction (to me) produces hydrogen, lots of hydrogen which can explode easily. The reactor building exploded due to the hydrogen built-up.

The four units are all affected due to overheating. The explosions coupled with tsunami impact and continual tremor of the earthquake, caused cracks in the containment of the radioactive material which resulted in radioactive leakage. A radius of 20km affecting more than 200,000 people were being evacuated. It is horrendous and heart touching.

The risk of having a nuclear power plant is so great that the design is improving with safety as the main priority. The accident in Fukushima will initiate more robustness in the design. Therefore we can expect the nuclear plant in the future to be stronger, much stronger, able to withhold all knowns hazards, be it fire, fire crashing, etc. Of course, the cost of building it will be higher, but safety is not something we can take for granted.

Energy Security: The importance of strategic Mix with NUCLEAR

2011-03-13T08:57:00.002-04:00

Energy security is:

From the demand side i.e. the consumers: to have energy/electricity at all time. they demand that whenever they switch on the plug, electricity will flow.

From the supply side: to be able to supply electricity at all time to all consumers.

How?
In order to be able to supply electricity, fuel is needed to generate electricity.

Gas/Coal/Oil/Biofuel is burnt to boil water then to produce steam that moves the turbines. The moving turbine will produce electricity through electromagnetic conversion. Think of dynamo, dynamo can be found usually in bike with lamp. You will cycle the wheel, the bike will move while moving the rotor in dynamo which will produce electricity to light up the lamp.

Similarly, wind turbine need wind to move the turbine that produces electricity, while hydro need water to move the turbine.

In a nuclear power plant, the nuclear reaction will produce heat that will boil the water to produce steam which will then move the turbine.

In a nutshell, many sources of electricity uses turbine to generate electricity.

It is different with solar power panel, which need the sunlight to initiate reaction within the semiconductor that will produce electricity without the need of turbine.

However, let's move back to the main topic. ENERGY SECURITY.

In general, you need something to produce electricity. You cannot rely on just one source of electricity generation. What if that one source of electricity is not available?

Most fuels need to be replenish at once when there are burnt. Coal needed to be supplied constantly in order for the power plant to continue producing electricity. Similarly, gas, oil, biofuels, water, wind and sunshine need to be available at all time if you want to produce electricity at all time. But we know that would not happen at all time. Sun will not shine at night or when it is raining or when it is cloudy. Wind will not blow at all time. Gas would not available if there is problem at gas terminal or at the gas pipelines. Coal will not be available if there problems at the mines or if the ship that delivers coal does not arrive. Oil cannot be delivered without using road tankers or ship tankers.

What about nuclear power plant? The fuel that it uses can last for 18 to 24 months without replenishment. Thus, once you put the fuel in day 1, you can be rest assured that power/electricity will continue to be generated for 18 months or until day 540 or longer depending on the design.

This is energy security! with nuclear as part of the energy mix!

Trust me, that gas/coal/oil that we have today are subjected to constant supply, without which, there will not be constant supply of electricity.

Japan Quake Aftermath : Nuclear Tragedy?

2011-03-12T06:23:00.002-05:00

This is the biggest ever earthquake ever happened in Japan.

Unpredictable.

There is no way the design of nuclear power plants can cater for something beyond probability. It is a sign from God through nature that we will be looking at something even bigger, even worse and beyond our predictions.

Why the world is worry about nuclear plants rather than other plants generating electricity? Why the focus on the nuclear power plant? Simply because any defect in the nuclear safety design can lead to disaster through radioactivity.

The nuclear plant will not explode like a nuclear bomb. Period. The explosions that happen are due to immerse pressure through heat and air inside the containment. The explosions are small in nature, similar to pops of balloons.

The nuclear plant will not explode like a nuclear bomb. Period. The fuel inside the nuclear plants are not concentrated enough to produce bomb-like explosions. The worst that can happen through the fuel is being too hot and melt which may cause leakage to the containment building.

The world are looking. Nuclear committee please do something to contain the radioactivity. Or else the nuclear renaissance will come to complete halt.

The body clock and Dreams

2011-03-11T07:53:00.002-05:00

I have noticed with the greatest interest that I would wake up exactly 6 hours after I laid asleep. However, I will often go back to sleep until my alarm sing. Last night I went to bed at around ten and woke up around four in the morning just to realize that it was only four and I did not feel like getting up, but it was cold last night thus I switched off the fan and looked for my blanket which was lying at the side of the bed on the floor. Later, I would wake up when my phone started singing. It was a typical night just like any other night, where I would be waking up exactly 6 hours after I felt asleep and went back to sleep again. I remember if I went to sleep around 3 am in the morning, I would wake up exactly after 6 hours i.e. at nine in the morning, no matter what happen or how loud my phone is singing. The only time I would be able to wake up if only and only if someone else would wake me up like my father or my mom or whoever else.

the night before last night, I had the most wonderful dream of bringing NJZ to see my family and I was happy holding her while walking her down the aisle. =DD

forte 2.0 so far

2011-03-04T09:19:00.002-05:00

i have been driving my forte 2.0 since July 2010. The ride has been smooth with insignificant complaints. the pickup is good since it is a 2000cc car, fast to accelerate and able to move around quickly without having to press hard on the gas pedal. the fuel consumption may be on the higher side. On highway it can go at around 8.5 liter per 100km and at full city driving it can go up to 11 liter per 100km. usually, at any normal days, i would fill up my car to its fullest capacity, usually at around 45 liters, this 45 liters of fuel can usually go for as far as 400-500 km depending on the driving style and traffic condition. usually for my commute going to and from work and somewhere in the city, the full tank of 45 liters usually go to around 400km. but my driving style is bad for fuel economy, as i like to press hard on the gas pedal, to feel the exhilaration of driving the forte.

sometimes when travelling down on uneven road, i can hear the annoying rattle sound coming somewhere from the seat belt hook of the passenger and sometimes, from the driver side. it can go unnoticeable but the big ear of mine can sense those annoying rattle sound.

usually, after driving, after switching off the engine, i can hear cranking sound, like metal compressing, coming from the engine, people in the forums say that it is ok and nothing to worry about. but still, it is annoying to hear sounds coming from the car.

sound proofing is so so. not so good and it gets rather noisy when it is raining heavily and going over uneven road. but the engine is quiet. when cruising on the road, normally you would not be able to sense the engine but the friction between the roads and tires spoil the tranquility.

sound system is good. i can feel immerse in the music and songs i am listening to. however, the radio quality somehow is not quite up to crystal clear sound. is it the car or is the radio station itself? i am not as i would always be listening from my ipod connected directly to the forte.

i like white color of my car. but i hate it when it gets dirty so easily. sometimes dirts are hard to get off / to scrap off.

the car does not feel cheap from the inside. it feels strong and robust. i feel safe driving it. with all the airbags to guarantee my safety.

Last day of Feb - what am I?

2011-02-27T20:27:00.003-05:00

it is not funny to think of me having a break despite the busyness at the office today. i am away again, unreachable at the comfort of my home in kuching. letting go of everything and freeing my mind of the undesirable thoughts of having to work. the work that i am doing, i am still the lowest of the lowest in the hierarchy. i figure that it is time now i delegate more eventhough i am without the power to do so.

let's start by asking ID to do the 1Data. maybe letting her in charge.

let's focus on my own dream. i dream to become the gabenor of Bank Negara, signing all the money as it is being design. looking at the macro economy of the world.

yes, i figure that I will focus my attention of becoming a financial know-how. I want to learn about the money, why it has value and why the values of money are different from each country. why are we all accepting a dollar bill? why the value changes?

what create a supply? demand.
what create a value? demand.
if people demand me, am i valuable.

creating a value in me, i have to create a demand out of me. making people need me and ultimately want me.

in order to be demanded, i have to create values that differentiate me from everyone else. what value am i creating?

i decided to be really good at the following:
- nuclear (on the surface - not the technical detail)
- finance (this i have yet to discover - i wanna be like tun daim - needed in times of need - during the crisis - knowing what's important - make you important)

That breakfast revisited

2011-02-05T01:37:00.003-05:00

Since NJZ confessed that she misses that one breakfast that we had, i'd just want to list all things happen prior, during and after that:

1) it was her proposal to have breakfast, since she felt bad that she could not accept my lunch proposal that week

2) she called the night before saying that she was worried that i could not clock in at 8 which i said it would not matter when exactly i do clocking

3) we're both early

4) she was having bad mood, complaining about my car seat that was so reclined

5) i did not talk much during the drive since she was looking stress

6) we both ordered roti telur, teh tarik for me and warm water for her

7) she confessed that she don't do breakfast usually but in her words, "you're an exception"

8) her mood improve as we talked, she suggest molten rocks a solution to power generation, i said it was new technology and never heard of it. i made fun of the announcement by raju on the load speaker (which was in tamil/hindustan) that they are calling for me to get back to the office.

9) i made joke about the announcement everytime, and everytime she laughed

10) she insisted on paying for the meal which i reluctantly let her. i playfully suggest that she buy some kueh for her boss which she refused but she did buy some for herself.

11) she complained that my car was so dirty, i said that i just washed it but it was raining these few days and i have uncovered parking

12) she made fun of my choice in music while shuffling through my music collection in my iphone which then whe settled for "I Try" by Macy Gray

13) she said that maybe this would be our last time seeing each other which i asked why and went oooohhh aahhh

14) when we arrived at her office i told her that i like her company which she reciprocated

Perplexed still, I am

2011-01-30T09:59:00.003-05:00

What would it mean when a girl said well done for being so sweet? and share with you a youtube link on a dutch couple who was being interviewed by a Holland TV station on when was the last time they had sex? did it even matter what she was thinking? maybe i am thinking too deep into this matter. maybe all she wished was to share some laughter. and proposed that we should go to Holland, totally. and she answered yes we should =DD. knowing girls i think maybe they have underlying meanings to whatever is being said. knowing boys, most of what we said came out as being spontaneous and without having particular meaning at all. not with girls because they so emotionally attached and i wonder if everything they said go more than they sound. she also said that she missed having breakfast with me when in reality we only had breakfast once. maybe that one breakfast that we had was the best memorable memory about me.

i called her and she picked up but she was not saying anything. just listening to me saying hello for numerous times, for 47 seconds to be exact. she emailed to ask if tried to call her. i asked why there was deafening silence on her side and she said she heard me. then she called me to say that she was rather busy but she just calling to let me hear her voice. later she called again to ask how i was and later i found out that she is skype-ing through her phone and she was not in her room but was outside visiting her old college. that explains several things. she was just listening because maybe she was with some people.

i guess maybe she was very similar to me. as if she was the female version of me, ergo her emotions are sometimes hard to comprehend by a mere man like me.

I hope I wasn't mean to NJZ

2011-01-23T08:53:00.005-05:00

On a beautiful date of 11-1-11 I wrote a simple note to her which was sent later that evening. The stamp should cost RM1.50 for a 10 gram letter but I insisted to pay RM2 for the stamp. The note was so simple that it did not fill a whole A4 letter. I posted the note using an envelope which was meant for SZZR, now thanks to NJZ and I managed to completely eliminate the feeling I had for SZZR. SZM was not able to do that but NJZ did and I would be forever grateful to her.

Well, the letter or the note arrived 9 days later on 20-1-11 around noon her time and around 8 pm our time. NJZ seemed to be highly jubilant from the emails she sent to me. She sent two emails which I purposely did not reply instantaneously and she sent another to shout just my name the next morning which I delayed the reply until around noon my time or while she was sleeping supposedly at her time zone.

She called me that night while I was having class. The call was one-sided since I could hear her but she could not hear me. She called using skype thus the number was blocked. She emailed to say that her wifi connection was bad and I blatantly sent an email saying that UK has bad internet while US has good internet connection because they started the internet.

Am I mean? I hope not. We exchanged few emails arguing about that.

She called to say goodbye.

2011-01-05T07:32:00.002-05:00

Last night, as I was fidgeting whether to call or not call and when to call, at night or in the morning, I felt twitching on my right eyelid thinking maybe someone dear is thinking of me. All of the sudden, my phone rang and it was her, NJZ. Wow, I took a deep breath and answered the call. I was happy to hear her voice and as usual she asked whether I was busy or not. No, I was sitting at home thinking about her. My real intention was not to call her at all and let her wonder where I was, just like what Amir Khan did in 3 idiots making everyone who cares search for him.

Well she said that I represent tenaga, and everything she would like to remember about tenaga. It was actually so sweet of her to be calling me. We talked for the longest duration in any phone calls that we had ever had.

She is leaving tonight, 2 hours after midnight. I am not planning to call her because by now and then, she would be busy doing all sorts of things thinkable to mankind when they're leaving. If I were to be in her shoes, I won't even carrying my phone, I will leave it with my parents because going overseas to study, I won't be using my the calling plan here of course. In fact, I only had my phone in the US for emergency. For everything else I rely on the internet since the speed is reliable and fast.

So perhaps, I will keep in touch with her later, some other times, when I feel like it. Till we meet again NJZ.

3 Idiots :: 2010 ends :: 2011 comes

2010-12-31T09:31:00.003-05:00

The heart is afraid, usually. Therefore, you will have to lie saying that, "All is well!" everything will be OK so that the heart will ease itself and do things that you are always afraid.

What's the worst that can happen? you should ask yourself. How bad can it be. Always think positive and everything will be OK. Trust yourself, BELIEVE in GOD and let whatever happens.

It is funny to think how on fate has decided that i finally watched the "3 Idiots" on Astro Fiesta channel 110 on New Year's Eve. How much I have reflected and learnt from the movie. A story about life of a genius who become a scientist that have 400 patents.

Don't always be chasing something. Be good with whatever you do and success will come looking for you.

I have been chasing too many things in 2010: dreams, targets and girls. Maybe it is time in 2011 to stop chasing and reflect. I will try to perfect myself in whatever I am doing. I am an engineer and I will continue to learn engineering. At the same as I have started taking MBA, I will continue be best at studying MBA. Focus on what I am doing and not trying to get everything at the same time.

Rushing is no good. Relax. Reflect. Try to perfect myself.

Even in relationship, I have been rushing. Been praying everyday for God to find me the best for me when I am not perfect. I will improve myself in 2011 so that I will be ready when the ONE for me appears. It may have already appears but I should not rush.

Take things slow. Get to know first. Fate will show me the ONE, eventually, inshaAllah.

I have been running. I will continue running to make sure I am fit and healthy.

I may have targeted this year to get married. Nonetheless, I should not be pressured or rush. Take it slow, all will go well, all will arrange itself and everything will work out, eventually.

Everything will be ready when I am ready.

So relax. All is well!

Men are simple

2010-12-28T08:25:00.003-05:00

Men are simple, they show affection when they are feeling it. It is hard to fake a feeling when you like somebody.

the first thing that men are attracted to is the appearance of the female. they will look from every angle before making any move. the body and the face must be satisfactory to the eyes which would then melt down to the heart.

men do not really think too hard or deep, they are impulsive and follow the voice inside the heart. they will make a move whenever there is an impulse to do so. but some men are shy and they need the push.

making the move is not that obvious. they may just stare at the female and see if she notices. sometimes men smile and many more times they like to act cool and pretend that they are not looking.

he will ask her to hang out. eat out. go somewhere where he can know get to know her. he may be acting not him. he is trying to think and make sense whether the female would be suitable for him. sometimes it is hard to make decision so he will ask for a second eat out...

men hate to write.

the final lesson

2010-12-26T03:55:00.003-05:00

although i went ranting about not wanting to initiate any more contact with NJZ, i could not. she taught me a lot but not about breaking up. i need to know one final lesson: how do you break up with girl without hurting her feeling. well, i finally got the answer today as I was confessing to her how much i love her and missing her more and more each day. well, she got my point and feel that i wanted to be more than just friend with her. so she told me how sweet i am, how we first knew each other, and that she like me for me and love hanging out with me because she is comfortable with me. but all she want is me being her friends, really good friends and whether i am ok with that. yes, why not, i am not surprised and am rather expecting her to say that.

take care, dear. : dear here is to clarify that she cares about me but doesn't like me in that way that she wanted to be more than friend or she would call me babe.

i have the highest suspicion that she still in love with her BF, HR. she went all over europe with him but i will never find out what happen to them. maybe they broke up or having a break with each other but she feel lonely since he's so far away perhaps and that she wrote a poem to him about wanting to be close with him like teeth and braces, shoes and laces or sentences without spaces.

so long dear.

Letting go

2010-12-22T05:35:00.002-05:00

22 12 2010

exactly after a month since i first dated her. I believe it is time to let her off my mind. i am tired, losing interest on her. she is stressed out and acting erratically, giving out mix signals to me.

so i believe it is time that i do not initiate anymore contacts with her, beginning from this moment onwards.

this is the best i can do for her. let time decides. how, i do not know.

i will start new, aiming on new flowers. goodbye NJZ, you have served your purposes and taught me a lot. Thank you.

i believe the dream girl i always wanted is someone like mar lia or zee ha. simple yet elegant. easy going yet witty and funny. athletic and always looking fresh.

Am I hooked or she is?

2010-12-14T09:44:00.004-05:00

14 Dec 2010. Tuesday.

She has so much going on with her life right now. There are so many things she has to settle with. She became laptop-less as her mac died on her due to the rain, exposed as she carried her laptop in her bag while its raining. She is going early next month on a new journey of her life.

Yet, we were having lunch again. This time around, she picked me up, as she was leaving from her house to her office in the afternoon. While at it, we went around the city as she needed to buy some fruits and delivered it to someone. As she seems so bad with direction in the city, I insisted that we do her chores first before having lunch. With the help of my iphone, we managed to find the targeted house and delivered the promised inventory. Since time is of an essence, I decided that we should just have our lunch somewhere nearby.

She parked across the street and went through the row of shop lots. What seem to be an easy task suddenly became less easy since we were having some difficulties in making up our mind. I suggest that we tried dominos, but upon entering the restaurant I decided that I did not like the menu so we went out and I said sorry to the waiter. We ended up having lunch at a random malay restaurant with no name on the outside.

she ordered pattaya and ice tea while i ordered mee goreng mamak and hot lemon tea. she confessed that she is a conservative type, with traditional values and like chillies sauce with her meal. my mee was not anything like mamak style but rather more to malay style.

as usual i feel good and she seems to feel good after the meeting. she was only worried on how to get back to her office which she eventually managed to.

she dropped me somewhere convenience as i need to go somewhere first before heading back to my office. after that i called just to check up on her but she was in a meeting.

a call that touches her soul. and she was grateful. which she told me the next day.

Taming or rather learning from the Pro Player NJZ

2010-12-03T18:31:00.004-05:00

3rd Disember 2010 - Friday

It was a long day and I was burnt out when I got home later at night.

I had to wake up earlier than usual in order to have breakfast at R a j u ' s with NJZ. This could be our last time alone together, she had taught me what I need to learn and I am all ready to go.

She looked rather grumpy when I picked her up at her office at 7.35. (Well, I arrived at my office at 7.16 to punch in then went to pick her up). She told me that she is at the phase of her life that makes her confused and depressed, because she knows that she will be leaving soon, leaving the things that she love here and facing the uncertainties ahead in UK where she will start a new life, as a postgraduate student where the classes would be different ergo the lifestyle. Going back to UK where the weather is gloomy, where she knows that she would be depressed most of the time because deep down inside she would be lonely. Being 24, unmarried, a girl would always feel insecure and worry. I didn't really know what to say so I just listened. Because if i said i totally understand then i would be lying. Honestly, i don't know what a girl feel even though i listen to many girl songs, I didn't really scrutinize their lyric but i just like the music because it is easy on my ear.

She usually does not have breakfast, but she said, "you are an exception". She was also earlier that day than any other days, she drove so fast from home that her speed needle reached the 160km/h mark. We promised last night to meet up at 7.45 but we were both earlier than expected.

Her mood gradually improve as we talked while we eat roti telur under the tree without sun shine shining brightly but the air was fresh with no one really yet coming to the usually crowded place (she was here before with other man, that's why i claimed her as a pro player since she has been seeing so many guys, which i lost count). She opened up about her life, she was the eldest of the two siblings, her brother is pretty young at 8yrs old. She has another brother which is slightly older but he is from different mother but the same father as her and he is married with his wife pregnant half-way. She would become an auntie at almost the same time when I will become an uncle. I knew earlier that she is 1/8th Pakistani but through our conversation i know that she is 1/2 Chinese since her mother is a Chinese. She asked if she look Chinese, I don't think so I said because honestly she does not look like anyone that I can associate her with. She is unique.

She paid for the breakfast which I was reluctant at first to let her but she insisted so I let her. She bought few of that Indian donut like kueh to eat at the office. As usual when she got back to my car, she would want to look at my iPhone and browse the music that was stored inside. She made fun of my music collection playfully. She had trouble finding a song that she would settle down with.

When I sent her back to her office, her mood had improved dramatically. She was herself again and I told her that I like her company and vice versa she agreed with me.

She left me with a song by Macy Gray - I Try: I am not sure whether she wanted to convey any message or she just like to hear the slow melody.

Games, changes and fears
When will they go from here
When will they stop
I believe that fate has brought us here
And we should be together
But wer,e not
I play it off but I'm dreamin of you
I'll keep it cool but I'm fiendin.
I try to say goodbye and I choke
I try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not near
Goodbye and I choke
I try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not near

I may appear to be free
But I'm just a prisoner of your love
I may seem alright and smile when you leave
But my smiles are just a front
I play it off but I'm dreamin of you
I'll keep my cool but I'm fiendin
I try to say goodbye and I choke
I try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not near

Here is my confession
May I be your possesion
Boy I need your touch
Your love kisses and such
With all my might I try
But this I can't deny
I play it off but im dreamin of you
I'll keep my cool but I'm fiendin
I try to say good bye and I choke
I try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not near

Despite, we had lunch

2010-11-23T09:33:00.002-05:00

22 11 2010 - I met NJZ again, this time for lunch. This is the third encounter. The first at the HQ while meeting someone of importance and the second is in Penang while conducting an event of importance. However, this is really the first time we were really talking. Real talk, to know each other.

Despite all the feelings I had, I decided to accept my good old friend advice to apology and amend the relationship that is about to be broken of due to me making an ASS of myself, assuming what she was thinking or feeling based on signs and gut feeling. So I apologize and asked her out for lunch.

So I picked her up and it felt so natural. As if we had known each other forever. So she was 1/8 Pakistani and we went to an Indian food restaurant (although I made that decision without knowing that she had some Pakistani blood in her.

She is bubbly, talkative and smart and witty and funny. I realized now that I like her company. But alas, she will be leaving this country after about a month. She sounded sad that she would be leaving, saying that there would not be much time to hang out with her friends, that she would be unfair to marry someone and then not wanting to have baby right away because she do not want to have to choose between her love for higher education against having her own baby.

Strange as it sounds, we talked about marriage.

And lots of things.

I have the feeling that I should take this opportunity to pour everything that I had up in my sleeve. After all, what do i have to lose? I will be losing her anyway. So better let loose of everything, I think. To try, so that I will learn, cause time is running out, of course I do not want to start learning when I found the right person to marry because then it would be too late.

Maybe, it is fate that she is God sent for me to learn, about life.

Screw you NJZ

2010-11-12T21:26:00.003-05:00

A full circle of karma has been bestowed upon me. I totally experience everything that I did to SZM, now that it was done by NJZ to me.

I am bored, uninterested and tired of her. I will let her go. In fact, she had put a black spot inside my heart. It used to hurt, but not anymore.

I had been warned when she first appeared, that she was just monkeying with my heart. The appearance of a monkey yesterday morning came as a sign of what I would feel yesterday. She had shown her lowest interest level in me, and so I am and will be feeling towards her.

So screw her. She is nothing special actually. She wrote a book so? Because her father own a publishing company, so she can write any book she wanted and her father will publish it. She went to a well established university so? Anyone and many people including myself had been studying in well established university. She is taking a PhD so? She will be getting a permanent head damage and I, pity her. She is not tall and slender so? I will find somebody else who are and fun and witty and fair and smart and have the greatest faith towards Allah.

NJZ a pro at being a player

2010-11-10T06:26:00.002-05:00

It has been pretty hard to ask NJZ out, she always come up other things to do and other people to meet. Texting her does not seem fun anymore, she is slowly detaching herself away from me. I have the gut feeling that she had realize the mistake of giving out her phone number to me. So when I called, she would mumble and become pretty hard to comprehend. She's smart and I believe, witty too. She only being nice when answering my text and i feel i can empathize, she is doing the same thing i did to SZM a while back when I believe that me and SZM has no chemistry. SZM likes me and keep on sending me greetings everyday saying good morning and happy working till I became uninterested and delayed my reply to her.

But they say that man and woman behave differently. If a girl that i am not interested text me everyday, I will become annoyed and make her thing that I do not like her anymore by sending messages that does not really answer her question simply but to write something out of the blue that do not need any reply from her.

Is this karma? I am starting to like NJZ but she is playing game with me, she is acting hard to get. Does this mean that she not interested in me anymore after closer look at me. Or is she genuinely busy to be unable to accept my invitation for lunch and currently not replying my text.

Her answer to my invitation does seem any encouraging. She said something that she would take up my offer sometime in the future :) and what's with the smiley face? Is she trying to mock me.

So I decided that I will not pay anymore attention to her. I will not text her nor call her at least for 4 days. or do i keep on bugging her? making her life miserable and hopefully creating slight guilty feeling inside her heart. I think I will go with the second approach, to keep on bugging her everyday so that she would feel uneasy for not accepting my invite to go out with her. In addition, in a month or so she would disappear from this country so in a month or so if anything will go bad, I will not be seeing her. However, I will not make myself look like a psycho stalker. I will be discreet and persevere in making her guilty conscience resurface.

I will not her win. She does not always win! TEEHEE

Initial Assessment of NJZ

2010-11-08T09:00:00.004-05:00

Until to this date, I have not been able to actualize a one-on-one face-to-face heart-to-heart conversation with NJZ just to know her better. Our first arrangement to have lunch on Monday started with some delightful exchanges of messages on Saturday. First, it would coincide with another arrangement that she would have with another guy friend whom I have no interest of asking who he is. However, she had asked me to join them and reliving past experiences with SZZR, I accepted her extended invitation to have a threesome lunch at Subway taking into consideration the midpoint of the three participants involve in the arrangement. However, on Sunday alas she was just informed of an urgent meeting with someone with power at the office in the morning that she would afraid that would be dragged until lunch time and thus she asked my opinion of what to do and she did not want to "stand me up" and additionally her friend would also not coming (coincidentally convenient?). Thus she suggested that if I insisted, she would not mind having the lunch somewhere near to my place but despite that she was afraid that she would "stand me up" since she did not know when the meeting with someone of importance would finish. Taking into consideration many aspects of life and people of importance, I decided that she should not rush to have lunch with me or else I may regret if anything would happen to her. So I suggested that the lunch meeting to be put on hold until later dates that would be convenient to all parties involve.

Calling her has not been a delightful experience either. Either I could not listen to her clearly, cracking on the line or vice versa where she could not comprehend me properly. Is it due to her phone?, my phone?, the lines? or were she faking it so that we would not be talking on the phone perhaps? Thus, I do not feel like calling her again since she may perceive me as being stuttering due to not so smooth telephone line between us two. This does not happen when I call my sister or my family or my friends because I can talk as smoothly as possible without the line interfering.

I could not comprehend the feeling that we have, is it mutual or am I clapping with my hand that is not making any sound. But I really feel happy and excited when she replied to my messages/texts with all the :) emoticons that she put inside her texts.

As of now, I will carry it slow like pulling out a thread out of flour, the thread will not break and the flour will not spill over. Also, if I am trying too hard to get her, I should not be doing it at all. Because by trying too hard, we would be forcing something unnaturally. When something comes naturally then it would settle naturally and adhere firmly towards one another.

Perhaps I need a neutron to make the fusion work, between me and NJZ. And I am left to wonder, what would be the neutron?

The confusion over Hey You by NJZ

2010-11-03T08:54:00.004-04:00

I am baffled profoundly on this occasion of having to deal with an opposite sex who looks as if she is interested in me (and i would be interested in her if she is interested in me, but never mind if she is not). It seems like like/crush/love at the first sight for her because i never did start to get to know her but she did and managed to get in touch and befriended me through FB (nowadays, to befriend someone is as easy requesting friendship online and if the other party accepts then a friendship is established voila!).

Well, I have established an online friendship with her after bumping to her unexpectedly after meeting someone else I know, and she happened to be arranging meeting with that someone I know. So maybe she got to know my name during the bumping (even though I did not really physically bumped into her but we sort of playing eyes with each other). She looks fine to me and perhaps I do too looks fine to her.

After few online message exchanges, she out of the blue gave her phone number and asked me to call her. I called her that night (after serious hesitation) and it was really bad timing since she was having dinner with "someone", she said she would call back but she never did. I was hoping too she would not be calling me somehow since I was tired and really wanted to go to sleep. Anyhow, I would be meeting her the next morning. It was just that I would be feeling very uneasy if I did not called her that night since the fact that I would be seeing her the next day. True enough, I felt asleep afterwards without the slightest uneasiness at my heart.

I saw the next day and casually asked how she had been. This would be our first time talking one on one, face to face. She was rather inviting, it seems, since she was sitting alone looking busy at her computer. Although she looks busy I just sat next to her and exchange few remarks. She took her laptop from the desk onto her lap as if wanting to hide from me what she was doing. (in another instance, when I was sitting beside a female colleague, she dimmed her screen so dark that I had the feeling that she herself was having trouble looking at the screen, just so that I could not look at what she was looking at her laptop screen). However, she found some free time out of her busy activity typing at the computer to actually talked and appear to pay attention to me. It was rather awkward, especially that she is speking English at me even though we are both Malay. It was more like I was speaking Malay and she kept answering me in English. It was then I lost my ball pen which was never recovered.

I went to sit elsewhere, somewhere more appropriate since my boss need me by his side. I did not talked to her the whole day, even during lunch when we were sitting at one table but of course the table was also occupied by few other people and we were not sitting side by side but actually opposite each other on that 8-person round table for lunch. So it would be more awkward for me to talk to her when she was at the other side of the table. I finally talked to her after the event ended and offered her my room since she had already checked and need to spend some times to wait for her flight at nine. Of course the room offer was not with me inside but I was about to go out the city and the room would empty and safe for her to go inside and take a rest, which she never did, which I believed was too much hassled since the shuttle bus to the airport is at seven while the moment the room offer was made it was already six. She would be better of sitting there and just wait for the shuttle bus than rather to go up the elevator, carry her stuff, go into the room then rush back downstairs to catch the bus. I totally agree with her action.

I figured that she never did go to my room since there was no trace of her in the room. I called her just to check whether she was safe but it was not picked up. However, she did text to say that she was already on board and I was sweet to offer the room but she did not really go to my room. I replied and asked whether she got lost finding my room but she never replied.

The no delete and write using iphone entry

2010-11-03T00:16:00.003-04:00

So in this entry i will type in one direction without hitting the backspace. Thus what was written will not be deleted even though there errors whether its small or big such as spelling error grammatical error or continuity.

I am now sitting in a nuklear colloqium bt tnb for the tbn staff in penang. For the first time in penang. I m finding penang to be about the same as any other cities in mapaysia. Like in plaes that i have been such as batu pahat melaka or kuching, the city in general bear some similiraties in the building arrangement, there's new side and old side which is imaginable when you been to some cities in malaysia.

Furst time also flying with firefly and alsi a first time after so many years to be flying from subang It is a beautiful airport resmbling some parts of dubai airport. The Irport is quite and easy. With not so many people flying.

Aah its so tiring writing or typing usi g iphone. So i will end here and again sorry for the errors the reason being described earlier. Thanks

I prefer Malaysia still

2010-10-21T08:16:00.002-04:00

After ten days travelling and sightseeing, I still find Malaysia has its own unique appeal in welcoming visitors.

First of all nothing is free in Austria. Arriving at the airport, you have to put 1 euro coin into the slot in order to use the trolley. As a first time traveler to Austria or Europe, you will not expect me to have euro coins at my disposal. I do have some euros but they were of course in big denominations. It would be difficult and awkward to obtain change for coins. Nevertheless, the airport appears old and somehow not very welcoming. Did I come at the wrong time? It seems dusty and bit dirty. Some of the toilet has to be paid, not in the airport but generally in other places such as the train station, namely Westbanhof, and it feels really expensive at 50 cents euro!

Second is the weather. Since it is almost winter, it is rather dry and cold. Somehow, I often felt wet inside my shoes and thus the smelly feet. This is something I can not comprehend, despite the dry weather, my feet is wet?! Additionally since the weather is dry, I had to put lotion all over my body after each shower or my skin will start cracking, again, is it just me?!

Nonetheless, Austria is very beautiful, mainly due to its long sustained history that goes back a long long way. The old buildings/structures that are still standing are magnificent and picturesque. The public transport is excellent.

The Sparks that should be there but was not

2010-08-07T19:27:00.000-04:00

Love the article below that I could not resist to copy and paste from datingish.com. It has put into perspective on a girl I had taken out for two times. Here it goes: (again the credit goes to the aforementioned site - with some adjustments here and there)

I've always complained about not having a girlfriend.
I dated girls in university when romantic gestures included walking her to class, going out to Walmart with her, and letting myself to be with her alone doing assignments. Our conversations never revolve around our feelings but rather our surroundings and homeworks that we were suppose to finish. I was "nice" to few girls but other than that, I've always been the single guy.

I spend way too much time looking for love and falling for the wrong girls. When I like someone, I like them for a long time. It's devastating when I find out they don't like me back. Girls that are interested in me have tried telling me that I shouldn't waste my time on the other girls. They tell me how great I am, ask me to hang out, and text me out of the blue, which is essentially what I want a girlfriend to do, but no they are never good enough for me.

It really is true that we want what we can't have. I love the chase, then I lose interest. There are a few girls right now who have been showing interest in me, but I can't tell if they really care about me or if they just want to have me around as boyfriend. I guess I wouldn't mind having some friends with benefits/casual flings, but I don't want to get emotionally attached if that's all they are.

I have gone on two dates recently, both with the same girl. She is very nice, has a good personality, and is pretty cute. She treats me like a prince. I'm just not feeling it though. There were no first date sparks or feelings of like like. I kinda feel like I'm telling myself to be into the girl because I'm very picky when it comes to dating. But why should I force something when the feelings aren't there?

I know the girl is definitely into me. She mentions future dates and texts me almost everyday. I have not been the one to text first and I don't say much to her, which is unlike me. I am usually the first to text a girl I like and I've even done the double text if I don't get a response. My face lights up when the girl I like texts me first, but not when this girl texts me. I'm trying to tell myself to go with the flow and keep going on dates with her, but I don't think it's fair to drag her on when I could think of other girls I'd rather be out with.

There's nothing wrong with this girl. I can't think of specific reasons why I don't like her, but I just don't like her like her. Like I said before, there's no sparks--no connection, for me at least. I've felt more into girls I've made eye contact with while walking into a room than I feel with this girl.

Just because she's there and she's into me shouldn't mean I should settle. I'd rather continue living the single life until I find a girl who gives me butterflies. I want to find Ms. Right (don't we all?). I want to be pursued. I want to fall madly in love. I want to have a real relationship full of lust and love. I want to love and be loved. But I'm willing to be girlfriend-less until I feel this way on my own. I don't need a superficial relationship. It's like I'm going through the motions just to check "get a girlfriend" off my list.

What do you think I should do? How do you feel about having a girlfriend just to have one? If you were me, would you keep hanging out with this girl and pretending to feel something, or would you tell her you're just not that into her?

Anyway today I will be meeting her to give her something that she asked me to buy when I was at my hometown. I have been delaying the delivery till today.

A white forte reporting in.

2010-07-23T05:54:00.002-04:00

Received the baby forte yesterday late in the afternoon after 6 pm eventhough it was ever ready few hours before that but i was not able to come any earlier due to unavoidable circumstances. It was not conceived yesterday but had been running around for about 300 km before it came reporting to me. It came unharm and without any proper tinting resulting in impromptu persuasion from mu sales agent. I thought it came tinted but was told that the tinted is there incorporate to the glass at minimal 30%. I thought of delaying the tinting to a time when it is absolutely necessary but had to gave in to the SA's perseverence. Wihthout a doubt I figured that he will get some commission upon bringing me to the tint shop.

Nevertheless, the ride is marvellous. Despite reading comments that the engine was rough, i would have to disagree. The engine was smooth at idle and constant speed. The pickup depends on how hard the gas pedal was pressed. The harder it was pressed, the louder is the roaring sound (but not as loud as ferrari or lamboghini) and is faster the acceleration.

I am still not quite done with the drive as I am going back to kuching today. The dumbest thing happened as I burnt the ticket due to my late arrival to the airport. All i could say to myself is not to take things so easily eventhough the task seems so simple. That being said, i missed the flight because I could not get any taxi to fetch me from sepang to the airport. What seems not logical happens, no taxi seemed to want to stop and give me a ride and the scarcity of taxies and busses were unbelieavble on a friday afternoon at sepang. Alas, i got a bus heading to KLIA and had to jump halfway in order to catch a taxi to LCCT which cost me 30. Unbelievable! Eureka. Here i am sitting in the airport waiting for the next availabe flight at 6.40 pm. Fyi, i had to buy a new ticket in order to go back. My ticket was not entertained eventhough i arrived 10 minutes before the flight's departure time. The counter agent said that the gate had already closed and if i insist on going to fly to kuching, i should buy a new ticket. The new ti ket is indeed more expensive but rather than going back to m house and the office empty handed empty mind i just bought the ticket.

Tomorrow, would it be?

2010-07-21T08:32:00.003-04:00

Got a called today at 11 am while having my morning tea break from my sales agent whose I decided not reveal to anyone unless it is truly necessary. He asked for the details on my insurance, on the NCD on how much I should be charged and waived due to my current NCD entitlement. He was saying that since my loan is a full loan, thus the insurance premium would be higher than buying the car without applying the full loan. Fortunately, the higher cost of insurance premium can be offset with my current NCD entitlement so that I do not have to pay any extra. He called to get my current insurance which luckily was made online last year through MYEG. With that I just need to forward the email sent by MYEG to him so that he can processed the application and the registration for the new white Forte. I called again later that afternoon to know about the progress of getting the new Forte, well good news he said that I would be able to collect the car tomorrow evening after work. I hope that I will arrive in KL early after the visit to a hot spring in Slim River Perak in the morning. So that I would be able to rush through the traffic to get back to Ampang.

However, he did not say anything about my current car. To be on the safe side I will just prepare the car to be handled over to him. I will also prepare a check to pay off the balance of my current loan of my current car.

I'd love to see tomorrow. I am looking forward to it. Everything that will happen tomorrow.

Agreement Signed but color could be white, etc.

2010-07-17T09:49:00.003-04:00

Signed the agreement yesterday (paid RM190 for stamping), a rush day of Friday after collecting my car from my father. The hassle was not over as I had to go to the sales agent in order to show my current car to the panelist. The panelist, Wong was not at all to happy as he had been waiting since 3.30pm and I only arrived an hour or so later. Further disappointment as the car was manufactured in 2007 rather than 2008. After minutes of looking here an there, touching and feeling the car, Wong offered 13k for the car and I just accepted? Why? Why didn't I haggle for a higher value? Perhaps I did not want to dragged it further as I had been rushing and sweating. Moreover, I honestly would not even buy the car more than 15k.

As for the new car, all was left at the moment was a white one. After some inspection on the white car, I agree to take on the color instead of a metal bronze, however, the white car was not really all available as there was somebody else eying for that as well. Well, the sales agent had to confirmed with his boss first and will get back to me perhaps on Monday. I paid him RM240 for registration and all. I also trusted him with the original ownership grant of my current car. I Allah I trust that He will protect me from the bad and worst of the world and the hereafter.

Forte Metal Bronze (3)

2010-07-13T08:25:00.003-04:00

The agent called to inform that the full loan has been approved after minor adjustment from yesterday by omitting zakat deduction in the payslip. The key is to produce a letter saying that the deduction has been removed in order for the 0.5 formula to work. Nothing seems straightforward in 0.5 formula. In order to qualify for the loan, your total salary must be able to retain 0.5 of your total pay i.e. the amount of loan eligible is equal to {gross Income x 0.5 - EPF - other deductions}.

Next is the signing of the agreement which was agreed today be carried out on Friday afternoon. A slight delay as the metal bronze color is not available on the spot. I refused to settle with a white since white is too common on the road. It is fate, since I have been worrying on leaving the car on its own while I am away on a jetplane to Kuching for 5 days. Now that the car will take some time to arrive (probably 2-3 weeks), I will have nothing to worry when I will be away on the next weekend.

It is something to look upon as I will be delaying the engagement of the mission and will be on a lookout along the way.

Dad gonna arrived on Thursday to go to Malacca the next day. Guess it is gonna be a surprise after all.

Forte Metal Bronze (2)

2010-07-09T09:32:00.002-04:00

The bank called today at around 3 pm just after I got back from friday prayer/break. They asked for some info such as my address, my mom's name, and to clarify few things such as my IC no. and my name. It was smooth sailing, the banker told me that my loan has no problem and is expected to be ready next week either on Monday or Tuesday.

He asked for few things though, to be submitted when signing the loan agreement next week:

copy of my IC
copy of my license
bank statement that mention the depositing of my salary
job confirmation letter
Biro Angkasa Form
RM 190 to pay the stamps.

He said there were 7 things to bring but either I forgot the seventh or he forgot to mention it or maybe it has been already been submitted by my agent.

I also called the bank that loan me my current car. As of today, I still have RM19,930.40 to pay during the agreed period of time. However if I choose to settle the loan by the end of this month, I just need to pay RM17,368.80. I hope that my car can sell of around 17k so I do not have to pay much when finalizing the deal later.

Somehow, somewhere inside I feel no feeling for the girl that I am currently with. As if I am not expecting anymore of friendship. So I keep my cool and let time goes and I decided to appear online lesser at my yahoo. So that she may feel the same way about me that we are just going to be friends and no more than that. Sorry, that I am only listening to what my body is telling me, my heart and my brain. I should fly higher, deeper and wider to find the truly dearly zarina of mine.

Forte Metal Bronze

2010-07-08T10:51:00.002-04:00

Yesterday [7-7-2010], I was a little out of my mind. I forgot my ID so could not enter the office without somebody else opening the door for me. It was annoying and troublesome. I was not feeling well as well so on the way back home I decided to visit a doctor. Prior to visiting the doctor I stopped at few places just by instinct.

After the long traffic on the way to Carrefour (oh yes, I would also like to buy Gamoden since it is effective to strengthen and immunize my body against allergens, since I have been getting my asthma back since the weekend I got on a flu), I saw a Naza showroom at the Ampang waterfront. Since I have been eying the beautiful body of a forte I decided to stop by and examined the forte closely. Oh, what a beautiful sight it is especially the forte 2.0, the interior feel so tough and safe thanks to the 6 airbag surrounding the inside. There are plentiful of features stuck inside the forte that I heart such as the auto cruise function and IPOD connectivity.

I let myself in, sitting at different sides of the forte, it just feel right. That is when the sales agent persuade me to book the car I agreed. So, yesterday I just made my booking on a forte. Wow what a decision, I asked the sales agent to also help me settle the current loan on my iswara aeroback which had been bought at the beginning of 2008. He said he will deal with the bank to help me settle the loan by selling the car to second hand dealer, when he made a call to the dealer, the price quoted was 17k, with no accident of whatsoever. i doubt that I will get 17k since there are some dent here and there at the car due to some minor hit here and there either due to my own-self or others who had driven the car.

The sales agent asked for my EA form as well as 3 months salary slip in order for me to apply for a new loan. I hope to get for a full loan from Bank Rakyat or Bank Islam. Since my age is below 30 years old and have a stable job at a government related company, the sales agent assured me that I would be eligible for a full loan for ten years. I decided that the more I save today, the better I am if anyone understand the value of money. The money today that I have worth more than the money that I expected to have in the future.

Although there is a lot of rumors saying that the car prices in Malaysia would fall, I have strong doubt to that looking at the current price trending of a new honda city, the new hyundai sonata or new hyundai tuscon, the new chevy cruze and the so much anticipated waja replacement model which would start at 75k for 1.8 engine. Even so, there are stronger rumors that the launch of the waja replacement would be postponed to a date no one knows due to some complications with mitsubishi engine or vendor i truly do not know or sure. Nevertheless, when the car will actually comes out, it is not advisable to just buy the car since it would be the first batch and first batch of Proton cars are notoriously known to have so many problems here and there. With the forte, I got much confidence since it was fully imported from Korea, a country so wanted to prove their achievement to be as good or better than Japan or Taiwan. I trust the Korean to be careful of exporting their car to Malaysia so as to ensure that their face value would not be tarnished. In addition, the forte has been around since the end of last year and thus far, I have not heard any major issues. In comparison with Honda or Toyota, forte has offered more features in and out. I hope I am making a good decision yesterday when placing a booking for a metal bronze 2.0 forte.

Today I submitted my EA form and my salary slip. Let's wait and see how the Naza dealer at Ampang waterfront perform. I decided to record my experience of buying a new car while letting go a my current car which has more than 4 years of loan to go.

Switching: From Maxis to Digi

2010-04-22T09:52:00.002-04:00

Just two weeks ago, I switched to Digi. My main reason for switching is because I wanna get an iPhone due to Digi's more attractive plan.

The verdict: Digi's price is lower because its coverage is smaller.

Sometimes, I do not even have a signal at my own home when Maxis's signal strength is at full bar.

Another verdict: Digi's price is lower because its data speed is slower.

Digi's do not have HSDPA but Maxis does, but when I do get a Digi's 3G, I think the speed is sufficient for my iPhone.

Digi 3G

2010-04-12T06:32:00.001-04:00

Auto Clean Your Butt Toilet

2010-01-21T07:32:00.002-05:00

Just press the button and wallah, your but is cleaned in no time!

Happy New Decade! 2010.

2009-12-31T03:58:00.002-05:00

Hello world.

Thank you for having me. I will explore other parts of you that I have never been. This year, I have not been too far away from where I am living. I will try to change, to explore more of what is in store for the living.

Hello all.

Thank you for teaching me, everything that I've learnt, I will continue to learn.

Goodbye 2009.

I had a lot of fun. It seems like yesterday that I crossed over to experience 2009, but now it is almost over. Time will continue to tick, without waiting for anyone, even me. I've tried new things in 2009: paintball, golf, spelunking, MBA, etc. I will continue some, some I have to continue e.g. my MBA, others will depend on the mood.

Chapter 1 Part 1

2009-11-14T05:45:00.002-05:00

The ray of sun woke me up, sunny today. Today is Sunday and I don't have any plan of whatsoever, no class, no meeting, nothing on schedule. I closed the shade and stay laying in bed.

Knock on the door.

"House-keeping!"

Strange, housekeeping never come on Sunday.

"Is someone in there? I am coming in with my spare keys!?"

"Wait-up, I will open the door in a sec!"

"Aiman Zainul Rahim?"

"Yes," I never had a housekeeper asking for a name before. I guessed I made a wrong move, as the last thing I remembered before closing my eyes was the mist coming out from his spray.

bukit gasing at jalan gasing

2009-10-27T10:18:00.002-04:00

this evening, we went for a hike at bukit gasing. it is behind the federal highway overlooking the whole jalan gasing area. there are quarters for JKR peeps which i consider those JKR peeps being lucky because they have quarters in strategic places around KL.

1Malaysia

2009-10-27T10:11:00.002-04:00

1Malaysia is like any other 1.

1data = all data in one file

1life = all life in one

1man= all man for one man

1island= all island in one place (hawaii)

to achieve 1malaysia: we have to look at all malaysia becoming one.

when all become one, everything must be the same.

all speaking one language, all must agree to speak what language, english? chinese? indian? malay?

all have to decide and all have to agree.

for all to agree it is impossible

because no one person is the same, people are different, that is reality

therefore if all cannot become one

then 1malaysia is impossible

because no all people can agree in one thing

conclusion :: we will never see 1malaysia, unless everyone in malaysia is a clone.

Final Exam

2009-10-10T08:20:00.002-04:00

First final exam after two years.

Not easy. ACC6110: would I be taking this subject again?

Surprisingly, there were many theories being asked. I never would have guessed that I would be writing a lot for an Accounting exam. ~sigh~

MBA is not easy.

Searhing for perfection

2009-10-10T08:11:00.003-04:00

Perfect score... 10/10

Perfect! Nicely done.

I am not a perfectionist yet my heart is.

I know I am not perfect but I am looking for one.

I do not even try to be perfect.

10.10.2009 - a good date to get married.

Perfect day, not the roads. Everywhere is congested.

Searching everyday for the perfect one.

The closer I look, the less the chance for finding the perfect one.

Should I close one eye?

Should I ignore some blemishes?

Should I pick randomly?

It is not easy. Only one choice, once in a lifetime.

I should not settle for less than perfect.

It has to be just perfect, according to my heart.

It OK to be Selfish

2009-08-16T09:17:00.002-04:00

sometimes .. at times .. you may or should be selfish of who you are ..

you ought to get yourself safe first before saving others.

some situations of not being selfish but was looked upon as being selfish

1) burglary: when all of a sudden, unknown male/female(s) got into the house out of no where. could be from the ceiling or the back door. there are 2 people in the house, you and your sister. you have the brightest opportunity of getting out of the house because you are just about to throw the rubbish outside and your sister is happily singing in her room. So you heard and saw the burglar running up stairs without realizing you are just about to get out of the house. you have two choice:

a) chase the burglar and try to save your sister or,

b) run outside, leave your sister inside, seek for help.

a very emotional and heroistic being will go to the kitchen, grab a big butcher knife and chase the burglar upstairs hoping to save his/her sister.

a very rational person, will continue throwing out the rubbish, run to the nearby available help e.g. the neighbours or anyone who seem able to help and ask someone or you yourself dial for help i.e. 999.

if you have to ask, i will choose the second option, as advised by any police.

the second choice although may seem selfish at first but have the higher chance of survivality not to seem like a more logical thing to do.

2) H1N1 : don't socialize, be selfish, but be safe

Cutthroat TOYOTA!

2009-08-07T20:59:00.002-04:00

Recently, Toyota Malaysia launched a hybrid version of their car, toyota prius in Malaysia with price of RM175,000 or equivalent to about USD 50,000. That is ridiculous.

Prior to that, honda has already been selling their honda civic hybrid at RM130,000 which is equivalent to about USD 37,142.

Comparing with the information from the web, the civic hybrid is selling at USD 24,360 in the US. It implies that the price in Malaysia is USD12,782 more expensive or at a thrilling RM44,700. With that amount of money, one can buy a Proton Persona 1.6 A/T.

So what is with extra money Malaysian has to pay to buy a non-Malaysian car? Is it tax? or is it the distributor in Malaysia is reaping for a lot of profit. I would think that it is both.

Then, what about toyota? Their selling price in the US is USD22,750 or equivalent to aboout RM 79,625. The difference in prices for Malaysia as compared to US is a whooping RM95,375. Woohoo! You can even buy a small house with that!

If the extra RM44,700 we would have to pay to buy civic hybrid is the tax, then, what is with the extra RM95,375 for the prius? are we that stupid to buy a car that is unnecessarily expensive? even with their catchy advertisement of saving the planet and go green, yo!

the government has to do something about this if they are serious about saving the planet. or is this about saving the oil industry? if the prius is affordable and everyone change to prius or similar hybrid cars, the demand for petrol will drop by 50% or more!

lu fikirlah sendiri...

Krispy Creme and TGI Friday is soo OVER-RATED

2009-07-20T10:13:00.002-04:00

food or dishes not native to a particular country become so unique and special when coming in to that particular country.

for example, malaysian teh tarik and roti canai can cost up to USD 10 in Boston.

a simple hamburger of TGI Friday can cost up to RM20 in Malaysia when the cost is merely 4 bucks in any US town.

a simple donut, yes kispy kreme is a simple donut can cost your wallet in Kuala Lumpur when in the US, krispy creme is sold in any grocery store e.g. walmart at a cheaper price than a pound of banana.

a pound of fat is so hard to lose with whatever diet I try.

the truth is, i am so dissapointed with TGI Friday. I was thinking about what to eat after watching Transformer some weeks ago on a friday night while shouting it's friday! thank God. It's friday I am hungry but what to eat? so we came accross this fancy restaurant which i fondly remembered being so good back then in states. Thank God It's Friday. but well, the food are all so dried, not juicy and lack of flavor. so i guessed we made terrible choice by choosing to eat there.

I gave free money to Tony Fernandes

2009-07-12T05:36:00.002-04:00

It was not the first time I had to change my AirAsia ticket. The reason remains the same. I bought the ticket too early because of the thought that the ticket will be cheaper if I buy it early. So early that I could not have foreseen that I need to get back to KL that weekend due to some commitment. This I hate.

Next raya I will be more careful in buying tickets. I hope that my parents would transfer back to Peninsular because I am having trouble getting the right dates going back home and getting the cheap ticket.

At this moment, AirAsia's ticket is cheaper that Malaysia Airlines's. AirAsia receently introduced the all-in-fair which is shown instantly when choosing the price and the price is cheaper due to administrative fee.

Bad decision

2009-07-01T04:16:00.001-04:00

I feel bad by not entertaining my instict to settle some issues during lunch. I could no longer trust a panel discussion that would start and end on time. Furthermore, this is malaysian style and most are not interested to be on time.

Technical Colloqium

2009-06-26T03:28:00.001-04:00

Cable fault

Out of the Box

2009-06-06T08:25:00.002-04:00

I was once persuaded by my lecturer to get out of the box. And so I did and after some time I got inside the box again. It is important to define the box itself.

I will ask myself, What is the box? The box surrounds me is what set the boundary between me and other people. I think more of me and less of others.

Getting out of the box is hard actually because I tend to love myself more than anything each day. Therefore, I need constant reminders from close friends, total strangers or the voice within. But most of the time, it is from the voice within that I start to get out of the box again. Because when I am inside the box, it is really hard to listen to others.

However, the first time I am out of the box is when I read a book that I borrowed from someone. I forgot the title as well as the author.

To get out of the box is not easy, firstly, I have to realize that I am inside the box. Because at most times, I never realize that I am inside the box. It is only after making some stupid mistakes, or blunt remarks that I realized that I am inside a box. I failed to assess the situation but rush to punish people for whatever is wrong in front of my eyes.

It is during serenity that I finally can hear the voice from within. Sometimes during prayer and sometimes during the process of waiting something awfully smelly out of my system. It is the time when I start questioning myself, asking question on why something happened the way it did, or why someone did what they had done. It is the time that I would try to be in someone else shoes and explore their possible thinking. I create scenarios and series of possible answers to problems that resulted in certain event.

After several moments of reminiscence during harmonization, I will pledge to be emphatic towards others, then it will carry on for several days or even weeks before I got back into the box.

Weather in Malaysia - It is uber hot and humid

2009-05-09T10:32:00.002-04:00

Month May - Very seldom rain, thus warmer air.

Here is humid thus when it is hot, i sweat profusely.

Outside is hot thus people are avoiding from getting out. They, including me prefer to be inside where it is colder, especially in an air conditioned room. But it is unhealthy to let your body experience a sudden change in temperature, i.e. staying inside is cold but then once stepping outside it is hot. More and more people are getting flu-type syndrome. But fear not my dear tourist friend, it is not Swine Flu although some often relate pig with sweating i.e. to say someone is sweating like a pig.

Actually, it is worse in the city where trees are scarce. in places where trees are plenty, it is relatively colder. Therefore, start planting up more trees, people... and.. use less paper.

Happy Mother's Day - How Much Does it Cost?

2009-05-09T09:54:00.002-04:00

It can cost anything you want. But the most important thing to a mom is not how much does it cost but how dearly you value her. Just a small token to say that she is valuable is sufficient to her.

One essay = hundred days

2009-04-20T10:00:00.002-04:00

I've been having writing an essay and it already took me more than a hundred days. the truth is i do not what to write, how to write my mind out and what i gathered, my past self is better than my current self at the moment. i have forgotten so many words that i am beginning to stumble upon words i used to know. it has been a while since i truly converse in English, I mean truly speaking in English, not counting the times i am speaking English with words other than English being in my English sentence. i have this habit of not speaking in English truly or rather seriously if the person i know i am speaking with is known to be able to understand Malay. i know that all Malaysian know how to speak Malay thus if i am going to stay forever in this country, i would not be able to speak English seriously and seriously i am beginning to believe that one day i will not be able to speak English at all. i am already scared that i will only be able to converse in English through writing and writing is never the same as speaking in English because when speaking i have to come with words and vocabulary instantly unlike writing where i can always depend on the computer to give me synonyms or translate whatever i want to say into perfect sense. oh how i wish i will be getting a free ticket out of the country so just i can explore the world and meet just everyone that i do not know and them not knowing how to speak Malay that i am force to speak correct English with them or else they will not understand whatever i am trying to converse with them. oh how awesome will it be if i ever be getting a golden leg that can kick so strong and run so fast i will never be needing a car to go anywhere anymore. however this is absurd and I KNOW.

Sony Ericsson C510- My Review

2009-04-11T09:15:00.003-04:00

About a month ago, I bought a new phone, a Sony Ericsson C510. Today, I am not using it because I have to send it to repair. The phone failed to fully recharge even after charging it overnight While charging, the phone showed the animation of the battery being charged. However, after an overnight recharged, the battery was only at around 20-5O% Then I took the phone out of the charger and the phone can only last for about so minutes. lwas annoying and feeling disappointed, I went to my dealer and requested for new battery. the gave me new battery but the problem still lingered. So I have no other choice but to agree to let the dealer sent the phone for repair. I asked for a new phone but all he can do is trying to repair it first.

Prior to this problem, the phone was working great. It takes great photos and I can send pictures and update facebook / blog to the web.

Lunch time

2009-04-01T00:18:00.001-04:00

It's about time for lunch, therefore save my work and prepare for hibernation. Bosses are out thus i am having peace at the office.

Desa Bestari

2009-03-29T05:51:00.001-04:00

To complete soon

an Hour for Earth - Earth Hour

2009-03-28T04:22:00.002-04:00

tonight is the night when earth finally gets its one hour of .... what i don't know - please ask the organizer for the answer. from 8:30 to 9:30 tonight, those who are in support of the earth hour will switch off their lights and most of their electrical equipments. i am in support.? i am not sure. i feel indifferent. but my company is. the billboards and signboards and the building lights will be turned off tonight at the mentioned time above. i wonder how many megawatt of electricity will be reduced in that one hour. why won't earth hour be expanded to nnot driving any cars or even not burning anything including smoking. for all we know earth hour is about showing support of the environment. one hour of turning off the light might reduced the amount of coal and gas burn to produce electricty so that the air will be less polluted in that one hour. what about cars? buses? trucks and smokers? they should stop too. if earth hour covers the wider horizon i am in full support. i hope that tonight i can breathe in cleaner air for one hour.

Limiting access to your blog(s)

2009-03-28T04:16:00.002-04:00

i guess blog-reading is not opened to just everyone anymore. as i was trying to go blog-hopping-slash-reading today i came across a blog which cannot be read unless i am invited. that is strange and creating mysteries, building intense and curiosity. is there some sort of confidential matters in that blog. or is the blog becoming too personal i.e. like reading someone's diary. a diary is usually kept to oneself with no intention of letting others know the writings inside until one day when the owner of the diary forgets, keep the diary lying around, or when someone goes through your things looking for something and then found the diary and then read it. and so now i know that blogger has a feature to limit access to your blogs just like facebook or friendster, etc.

Mobile Blogging

2009-03-28T03:59:00.002-04:00

My last two blog posting was done over the phone. It was something new to me. I realized that mobile blogging can be quite interesting, because sometimes i just have the urge to put something on my blog. Then the urge fades away once i get on with my computer and an internet connection. Most of the time i end up not writing anything on the net.

So why bother sharing by blogging. Sometimes, it is just for my own advantage. I may want to cherish something and to do that i would write something about it. Then why not own a diary which i can take anywhere? well a diary is not practical because i won't be bringing a book all the time. furthermore, i like to walk with nothing to carry. just me and myself and my essentials which can fit in my pockets i.e keys, wallet and cellphone.

therefore, mobile blogging is an answer. i can cherish a moment with my phone anytime as long as there is a line. it does not have to be a 3G line while 3G line can mean a faster connection, but with an ordinary line i can always get GPRS anytime.

then what ignite the interrest in mobile blogging? it is my new phone. i bought a new cellphone earlier this month i.e. a Sony Ericsson C510 and there's jst a lot of features i can be utilizing. my first step was to activate my GPRS setting on my network so that i can fully utilized the many things i can do with this phone such as checking emails and surfing the web. and it goes without saying that mobile blogging is one of the many features offered by the new C510.

My space

2009-03-24T22:21:00.003-04:00

Little Thai at Ampang Point

2009-03-24T22:21:00.001-04:00

Green chicken curry - full of flavor and creamy.

Renewing Malaysian Passport

2009-03-13T08:06:00.006-04:00

Why do we need a passport?

To get out of the country. And to get in the country.

Renewing a passport is not hard these days and will only take few hours if you manage to pay the renewing fee before 2.30 pm at any working day. Honestly, I have had the slightest idea of renewing a passport until I googled and read a couple sites.

1) http://www.imi.gov.my/eng/perkhidmatan/im_PasportMsia.asp

2) http://www.lifeinkl.com/2008/05/10/how-to-renew-your-passport/

nowadays everything can be googled and i wonder how large is the server for google? so far google is the best search engine and never failed to deliver.

so back to the real topic, the following are what I needed to get my passport done.

a photostat copy of myKad
myKad
2 photographs of applicant measuring 3.5 cm X 5.0 cm
cash (50 or 100 ringgit notes)
old passport (if any)

since I have an old passport, they insisted that I go to KIPPAS (kios pembaharuan passport), a machine which I was reluctant because machine is a machine and I can't talk with machines. But they insisted and so I gave in. Luckily the machine was not being hard on me. Everything was done in about 15 minutes. Here's what i vaguely remember on the machine's request.

select your language
insert your old passport in the slot and press continue
insert your myKad
place your right thumb on the scanner
select 300 or 600 pages of passport
insert your cash one at a time
enter you height in cm
enter your phone number
insert the following in the provided envelope (enter your particulars on the envelope):
- a photocopy of myKad
- a passport photo of yourself (blue background and recent)
- old passport
insert the envelope in the slot
please take the receipt
- the receipt tells when and where to collect your passport
- if the receipt is printed after 2.30pm, then your collection time will be the following day after 9 am
- if the receipt is printed before 2.30 pm, then it is possible to collect the new passport on the same day
- therefore, the following information from the imigration website is misleading:

It is a promise to deliver a new passport in 2 hours time if the payment is received before 3.30pm. I believe the promise is not applicable for processes made through the Kiosk but true only for application made through the counter. This is because your application from the Kiosk will only be collected by the respective staff at an interval. Additionally, the counter is at the 2nd floor while the kiosk is at the 1st floor.

So i received the receipt from the kiosk telling me to come and collect my new passport the next day. The following day i went straight to 2nd floor and approached counter 16, i gave my receipt and got a number eventhough i am the only one waiting. So I sat and waited. i saw that the guy behind the counter typed something and went to the next room to get something which i suspected was my passport. So after about 10 minutes my number was called and i was told to sign on several places and scanned my right thumb on the scanner. After signing behind my new passport, voila! i was set to go.

i was happy of course, if only i did not missed my exit to the Pusat Bandar Damansara or PBD lane i could have gotten back much earlier. but nevertheless, it's so trivial and need not to over react.

Paid Holiday and Adventure

2009-03-01T08:05:00.002-05:00

Yesterday, I joined a treasure hunt organized by one of our company's sudsidiary, TCI, from bangi to Port Dickson, Started early morning at 7:15 am, I arrived at the starting point. There were about 70+ cars consisting of four person per car. This was a new experience to me, joining Some friends from work. Our first few destinations were around the Bangi area. We were playing for fun and So were the other teams. No pressure.

Surprisingly, we won. We came in first. We won $1600. Divided by 4, each got $400. The winning prize covers the registration fee $300 and one night stay at the resort as well as the traveling cost i.e. gas and toll. In fact we felt that we were paid to have fun and enjoy the weekend.

I didn't type my blog entry!

2009-02-20T06:23:00.000-05:00

The previous post was not typed but was handwritten. How awesome is that? And so is this entry.

ANENT

2009-02-20T06:11:00.000-05:00

ANENT Stands for Asian Network for education in nuclear studies. I am spending two weeks to be involved in this project. Our first task is to learn on how to use MESSAGE through e-learning interactive classroom. Several countries are involved in this e-learning project i.e. Malaysia, Indonesia, Thailand, China, India, Korea, Pakistan and Philippines. We are very excited but at times, there are frustrations due to slow internet connection. Is it just us in Malaysia or global slowdown in internet connection? Because other countries are also complaining that they couldn't get online Whatever it is, by next week we have to start building the national case study. And today supposedly, we should be very comfortable with MESSAGE. I hope everything will go on smoothly.

The Death of My Laptop

2009-02-19T22:46:00.002-05:00

I spent about 7k in February alone. I wonder, why?

1) 2k++ to goddamned mechanics who persuaded that I should changed the rims and suspensions of my old car.

2) My beloved IBM laptop died of heart failure (the motherboard). Time of death: 8.30 pm 16th February 2009 (Monday). I had a technician analyzed my laptop (Tuesday) and he said that nothing could be done (Wednesday). Once the motherboard is out, it is better to find a new laptop. So on that fine Wedenesday I went to Lowyatt and fell in love with an HP Pavilion tx2500 Entertainment Notebook PC.

Why I like my New HP Pavilion?
It is bloody entertaining and flexible. I can do handwriting and make everything finger print secure. Lalala~ and it can sing better than my old IBM, being equipped with Altec Lansing speakers.

My 3 Paintball Events

2009-02-19T21:45:00.003-05:00

Here are the three paintball events i had gone through recently.

1. Advertlets Blogger Paintball Tournament
(17 January 2009 - Saturday) This was the first time I ever played paintball in my life. I registered for the RM10 Advertlets event and was paired up with 4 total strangers, namely Marcus, Evo, Celine and Uncle Zahari and we called our team "Team Yakuza". Except for Marcus and Evo, the rest of us were first timers. Surprisingly after playing the 4 rounds of preliminary games, we advanced to semifinal and then final. We emerged first runner up amongst the ~20 teams consisting of 5 person each that took part in this event. And so, we were promised a free entry to join the National Paintball League (NPL) tournament in Division 4, worth RM300.

2. Paintball Practice
(8 February 2009 - Sunday) In view of the upcoming NPL tournament, Marcus had organized a training season with his old buddy, Simon who is in the Division 3 of the NPL. We went to Astaka which is the home of MY-NPL to practice. We learnt a lot from Simon on the techniques, rules and practice of playing paintball. Prior to that, we had watched the videos on Youtube on the subject of paintball. We learnt a lot from the videos and lots more while practising with Simon. At Astaka, we had to pay each Rm100 consisting of RM20 for renting the house marker, RM20 for renting the house mask, RM20 for using the field and RM40 for the paintball pellets (we bought a box of 1000 pellets at RM200, divided by 5, each will carry 200 pellets thus costing RM40 for each person). At this moment one of our team mate, Celine had pulled out and replaced by Josh from the Advertlets. Thanks Simon for being our SIFU.

3. MY-NPL Paintball Tournament
(14 February 2009 - Saturday) This was the real event and we were excited and ready to shoot. Alas, we learnt that due to some technical issues, we had to pay for the registration fee which is RM300 for the whole team. Josh being the Advertlets liason, had arranged for the NPL people to give us 1000 pellets free of charge. Anyway, we had to buy a box of 2000 pellets to be used in the tournament. The preliminary round were held on Saturday and we had to play against 6 teams. We won 3 and we lost 3. In the end, we ranked 13 out of the 28 teams. Therefore we had to come the next day play for the semi final which we taunted as the Super Sweet Sixteen of the division 4 where top 16 team advances to the next round.

(15 February 2009 - Sunday) We came early for the semi final but the event only started after 10 am because they had to finish the premilinary rounds of Division 2 and 3 which failed to wrap up on Saturday. We bought another box of 2000 pellets for the event today. Team Yakuza (our team) had to face Team Infidelz. We were playing for the best of 3 games. In other words, the team must win 2 rounds in order to advanced further in the game. Team Infidelz ranked 4th in preliminary round (but I later learnt that they actually came out 2nd place in the prelim. but due to miscalc by the organizer they were ranked 4th). Anyhow, we lost the two games. The Infidelz were good, they played very quiet and only shoot whenever necessary. First game I was sniped out of nowhere and the pellet burst on my shoulder. Second game, I advanced to middle of the playing games thinking that no one was looking but then the fella came infront of me and shot me to elimination. My other teammates faced similar fate. It was a good game and we just had to accept our defeat.

What I like about paintball?
The adrenaline rush when shooting at your opponent and experiencing a whole new environment and meeting new people.

What I don't like about paintball?
The gears we have to put on before the game i.e. face mask, and other protective garments such as long sleeve and pads because once you get hit, the hit really stings if you are hit at places other than your face mask and marker. Honestly, I hate wearing the face mask bacause it is just uncomfortable and makes breathing a bit hard and your view is kind of limited. I also dislike shouting because i don't have loud voice and with the face mask, it is even harder to shout loudly. Finally, it is rather costly to play this game and i am not a millionaire.

Pictures?
I have none because I did bring any camera and my phone won't even take a decent picture of anything. Perhaps may other teammates have post some pictures in their blogs:
Uncle Z - http://xperienceoflife.blogspot.com/
Marcus - http://gyakudo.blogspot.com
Evo - http://euveng.blogspot.com/
Josh - http://josh.my/

Conclusion
Since I have more dislikes than likes, I am thinking that I will not be playing this game in the near future. I have made other commitments which is cheaper and more comfortable than paintball.

Defragmenter Could Not Start

2009-02-11T09:49:00.002-05:00

For weeks I have been trying to find the solution on why my windows defragmenter would not start. At last after reading lots of comments on tech forums, i downloaded a malware removal program: malwarebytes and did a dull scan. The program found several malwares including trojan and removed it from my computer. Then my computer is running OK again.

Malwarebytes is a freeware. You only have to pay US$29.99 if you want to do a real-time protection and schedule update. The free stuff just work like magic removing the bad bad things from your system.

However, if the problem is not cause by malware, the following might be the solution:

QUOTE (mph @ Jan 17 2008, 07:31 PM)

check the page file

control panel,open system,click advanced tab,click "settings" under performance,click advanced tab,click "change" under virtual memory,make sure no paging file isn't selected

also dont forget what patio said,open the command prompt,copy and paste in

chkdsk /r

press enter

type in y and press enter when asked if you want it to run the next time the computer is started

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

http://www.kellys-korner-xp.com/xp_tweaks.htm

291. Restore Defrag Snap-In

use internet explorer to download the reg file as some other browsers aren't suitable

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i dont know if any files that defrag.exe might use are covered by sfc /scannow

but it's always worth trying

http://www.updatexp.com/scannow-sfc.html

-------------------------

this i have copied from http://www.theeldergeek.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=28251

A Good Guy (AGG)

2009-02-11T07:59:00.002-05:00

Yesterday my sis called to say that she smelled something faulty while driving her car. It was the smell of rubber melting, so i told her to stop her car and peek outside to see what's wrong. It turned out that her right front tyre burst. Luckily she stopped or else her car would suffer serious damage.

So this is the time that i think i should get out of the office and go help my sis. While i was starting my car engine, a motorcyclist stopped and tried to help my sis but alas he did not have the right spanner. And so we waited for me, with my sis for about 35 minutes. I was surprised that he was such a gentleman, when i arrived he helped change the tyre while i stood at the side giving caution sign to the traffic. Since the car was in the middle of MRR2, the traffic was beastly, with huge lorries coming by i have to give hand signals so that the driver would see that somebody was fixing the tyre.

i was greatly grateful to the guy, so did my sis, furthermore as he refused to accept anything from us. i shall keep his kind deed embedded in my heart and i pray that he will get the best out of everything he chooses to have. amin.

Tiramisu - I can't sleep

2009-01-25T14:07:00.003-05:00

Happy Chinese New Year Everyone! It's the year of the OX. OX can also mean hugs and kisses. Well, I just could not sleep right now at this moment. It is 3 am and I don't feel like sleeping or feel sleepy. Instead, I am feeling so wary and conscious. It is like my mind is working with all its might, why? I think because I drank a whole mug of tiramisu ice blend when having a late night snack at midnight in commemoration of the Chinese new year!

Just now, I went to the top of bukit ampang at the looking out point to see the panoramic view of Kuala Lumpur at night. The sky was showered with fireworks especially as time approaches midnight. It was cold and raining a litlle bit for quite sometimes while we were eating at the restaurant. And so i thought I would be coming home feeling exhausted but hell yeah i just went to bed. but after couple hours trying to sleep and i still could not. my mind is awake and so i am writing on this blog.

tiramisu main ingredient is expresso coffee and i just could not drink coffee then sleep. i used to drink coffee while in college so that i can finish my assignments at night. but never to drink coffee and then expecting to sleep. it just would not do.

so i love tiramisu, especially in the cake form. but i will never consumed it at night when tomorrow is work. luckily, tomorrow is holiday in respect of the Chinese New Year. So i don't mind consuming it tonight. actually, i mind, because i am supposed to be sleeping right now. maybe surfing the web can make my mind tired and then i can go to sleep.

or maybe it is fate that i drank the tiramisu blend tonight because i need to send my sister to the airport at 5 am. In order to avoid missing the flight, i should not be sleeping, so that when the time comes i can wake her up. maybe that is waht is meant for me. for life always has is reason for happening in some ways that we never think about.

i believe in fate and always let fate decides the outcomes of my decisions. that i should never be too-regretful of anything because things happen for a particular reason. it is just ways to make us experience and learn the vauable lessons in life. because one day we will die and we want to die leaving behind some things that others will remember us for.

Change is coming, really?

2009-01-20T07:01:00.003-05:00

In less than 5 hours, Barrack Obama will be the 44th President of the United States of America. Right here right now I can not foresee what will happen once Obama become the President. Will change really happen? Especially, will the war in the middle stop once and for all? We never know, only time will tell.

Nevertheless, once Obama takes the oath as the new president, change has already been written in the history the world. The first black man to become the US president. Can he stay for at least 4 years? Only time will tell.

Bush : I hate to leave this place man..
Obama : It is time for change!
Bush : It is so cosy and secure, you know what I mean.. I really feel at home.
Obama : It is time for change!
Bush : I just hope you don't paint the white house any other color than white, you know it is called the white house.
Obama : It is time for change!
Bush : Oh please! Stop with the change. What can you do really. When you are in my shoes you will know what i mean. My hands are tied most of the time.
Obama : It is time for change!
Bush : Screw you and your changes.
Obama : It is time for change!
Bush : Ok, I am not talking to you no more..
Obama : It is time for change!
Bush : Shuu..
Obama : It is time for change!
Bush left the room with disgust while thinking 'Huh change change change, maybe he got no spare change!'

Saturday Morning : Paintball

2009-01-18T08:59:00.003-05:00

This picture was taken from a member of my fellow paintball teammate, a blogger at xperienceoflife.blogspot.com. Yesterday was not like any other saturday where i had to wake up as early as usual when i had to go to work. but it was worth it. i was going to play paintball for the very first time!

i signed up as individual for ten ringgit only and was put into a team of five consisting 4 other people that i had never met. the picture above shows all the team member of Yakuza, a newbie team with little or no experience at all. i think only two out of the five members have ever played paintball before excluding me. 4 males and a young lady. and guess what? one of the 4 males is a senior man with kid.

firstly, we played for 4 timess in the preliminary round against various teams. we won 3 out of 4 where two wins are because of disqualification of the opposing teams which some the opposing the team members took out their face mask while still in the playing field which resulted in instantaneous disqualification. the last win is when I and another team member became the last men standing and my team member grabbed the flag from the opposing side while i kept him safe from uninvited paintball pellets.

so surprisingly, we were qualified into the semi final, and guess what? we won yet another round. same tactic as before and i again became one of the two last men standing after eliminating the opposing team members who were trying to grab our flag. and yet again i kept my team mate safe while he grabbed the opponent's flag for the victory. unexpectedly we approached the final round to determine the first and second place. we were given about 7 minutes break.

the final round was tough. we were against a semi pro team that was playing carefully with strategies. we were sticking with the same tactic; wait in our sides until the opposing team finished their pellets. but that did not happen this time. the opposing team was very quick like the SWAT team in the television. they approached us from both sides and quickly eliminating my other team members. i was the last one to be still in the game because i kept hiding at the very back bunker. suddenly, three shots were fired from two sides. 2 shots hit my legs and the other one hit my back. i fell to the ground unconciously bleeding to death - haha, it never happened. i was stunned and raised my hand in defeat.

our team never expect to go this far. the team was only formed just before the game started. and the team members never know each other (only two of the team member know eact other).

all in all, it was really a very exciting experience for only ten ringgit. i could not ask for more. thank you Advertlets.

Address for Yong Loo Lin School of Medicine

2009-01-17T10:03:00.004-05:00

For some reason I may need the address below:

Department of Microbiology
Yong Loo Lin School of Medicine
National University of Singapore
Block MD4, 5 Science Drive 2
Singapore 117597

it would be a blessing to drive this car all the way to singapore. it's a hybrid! honda insight coming out in 2010.

Lorong Utara and Lorong Utara Kecil

2009-01-17T09:44:00.005-05:00

Lorong Utara and Lorong Utara Kecil in PJ is not connected. I just knew about it today! Actually, I missed a turn to Lorong Utara Kecil and then I saw another entry at Lorong Utara. Logically speaking, the roads should be connected because Lorong Utara is so close to Lorong Utara Kecil and they both have very similar names. Nevertheless, Lorong Utara does not lead to anywhere, it just makes a circle around some big housing estate. So I had no other choice but to make a u-turn to get to Lorong Utara Kecil where they nicely hide the big fields for any events such as football or soccer and futher down the road you can find the home to the Malaysian Paintball Association (MPA) where you can play paintball.

VOLT - number one fan - Chevrolet

2009-01-07T08:08:00.002-05:00

Go Green Go Electric Go Volt. I can't wait to see the materialization of this concept car. According to the research done by the Chevrolet R&D, most people commute less than 40 miles per day which is about 64 km. Less than 40 miles of moving, the car is expected to move solely on the battery without the need of charging. When the battery is depleted, the car will automatically charge the battery by using internal combustion using gasoline or other suitable types of fuel such as ethanol or biodiesel. Therefore, once you fill up the tank with fuel, and you can sustain by driving less than 40 miles without charging, your fuel will not be used at all! Thus it is possible to have full tank of fuel for the whole year provided you only move less than 40 miles per charging. At night, or anytime of the day when you are not using the car, you can plug in a power cable to any power point in the house or anywhere to charge the battery. It is expected that the battery will be fully charged in 6 to 8 hours of charging where you can then go another 40 miles without the need of fuel involved.

The car is expected to sell to the public by the end of 2010. Undeniably, the new study of the engine using electric motors and batteries is very exciting especially with the uncertainty in the supply of fuel to drive engines of vehicles. By 2011 I hope we can see more to the development of electric cars from other car manufacturers as well.

I remember very vaguely during the presentation of budget 2009, the government of malaysia will give incentives to the selling of hybrid car while encourage the R&D of Proton to built electric or green car which is more efficient and more environmental friendly. I really hope that the government will abolish import duty and any relevant taxes for the more efficient green cars i.e. hybrid and electric cars so that the price will be very attractive for majority of people to buy it. In achieving a developed country status, malaysia need to pay more attention to well-being of its environmental and fight off the pollutions.

Paintball for 10 ringgit?

2009-01-03T21:10:00.007-05:00

i came across an ad by Advertlets in one of the blogs that i read while blog-hopping. They (Advertlets) is organizing a paintball tournament for bloggers along with Malaysian National Paintball League (MY-NPL). 10 ringgit if you are within the network. and RM90 if you are not within the Advertlets networks. the price is inclusive of paintball marker rental fully equipped and paintball pellets.

when? --> 17th January 2009 (Saturday) from 8am until 6pm
where? --> MY-NPL’s home field, MAPAAC (Malaysian Paintball Academy) in Astaka field, PJ.
how? --> send in an email at info@advertlets.com with the subject “Advertlets Blogger’s Paintball Tournament!” along with your personal info i.e. your full name, e-mail address, blog URL and handphone number.

more info by visiting:

Advertlets

www.my-npl.org

www.mapaac.com

there are two options for registrating: as individual OR as a team of 5.

personally, i dont remember playing any paintball but i am utterly certain and confident that it would be very interesting.

paintball to my understanding is a team game to eliminate the opposing team by shooting them with paint-pellets. you are assumed to be dead when we can see paint splat on your body. of course you will need to wear some sort of special clothing complete with face mask so that you will not feel the sting of being shot. you can choose to be a pussy or a hero depending on your courage and determination.

this is a good game for those in military or those fantasizing about being in military but do not want to undergo trainings set by the officials. all and all this is a game about fun whether you lose or win and does not require any necessary skills like in football or other games.

this is also a good chance to get to know our own malaysian national paintball league. i don't even know about them until just after reading the adverts. apparently, they have been organizing tournaments locally and internationally while offering attractive prices.

playing paintball itself on your own is pretty pricey. you need to spend more than a hundred ringgit in order to really enjoy the game without any sponsoring as shown below:

So, what are you waiting for? Let's go for it!

help boost our economy

2009-01-02T11:35:00.003-05:00

it is good thing to see malaysians are still flocking to stalls, restaurants, shopping malls to spend money. the way to help our economy is by buying products or services offered. when money circulates more things can be done as oppose to when money is kept under the pillow. invest, but i don't think it is a good time to invest. money is better to be spent so that others can benefit from our money. when business makes profit, it will expand, when it expands, it will create more opportunities to many people.

spend money like there is no tomorrow, but at the same time, save some as if you are going to live forever and you are going to lose your income tomorrow.

when we believe that the economy is not sowing down, it will not, because at least somenone is still keeping it rolling. nevertheless, the most afected parties are those exporting most of their product overseas where people are beginning to lose faith on their economy. they stop buying things in fear of losing income.

when people are not spending, businesses will have low demand, low demand result in low profit which in turn will affect the survivability of the company. they may take drastic measures as slowing down production and letting go people because they do not need as many people to produce less goods. when more people are being laid off, less people are flocking down the street. more business will be affected. i hope this will not be happening in Malaysia. let us support our economy by spending more and more till you drop!

Yeay 2009!

2009-01-01T06:32:00.002-05:00

During new year celebration of new year last night, as one would have expected, the traffic is so congested that it would take 2 and and half hours to get from Kelang to Sunway. In general, people would see that the economic slowdown has not been seen in Malaysia. People are eating out and having fun like nothing happen. The celebration last night was a blast!

resolutions

2008-12-27T23:16:00.002-05:00

This is the time of the year when i will start reflecting and thinking on what i have done, what i could have done and what i would do next. This is the time of the year when i would be receiving new calendars and diary to start on a new leaf. I already hang the new ones and threw the old ones away. Looking at the dates, I first make notes on the public holidays for the year and start thinking on the possible dates for my holiday to kuching or elsewhere in the world.

so of course there are things i think i should have done, therefore it has to be carry forward the year is coming to an end really fast. for the muslim, the new year starts a few days earlier which is tomorrow. the new year in islam starts after the first migration of the muslim to medina to start on a new life. similarly, i should be starting new life beginning from tomorrow, similar things i have been doing for over twenty years. but years come and go and do not remember if i have started new life each time the year changes.

i can do it, i can change to a new me. yeah i mean it, i am feeling really serious right now. because i am supposed to be better each day. but i have waited, for i should not have waited because when i wait nothing will happen.

sometimes it is funny because after a while the strength in me will just fade away and often i will blame the surrounding. i am blaming that someone or something has stole my future, letting me down and under.

but of course i could not do it just like that without full intervention from GOD. i need to pray and ask for guidance. so of course, the need for solid notes for what i am planning to do in 2009 is crucial so that i could always refer to it later:

be less mean, but it is not quantifiable. so i should put something realistic on how less mean i should be. being less mean to anyone is to be humble and down to earth. listen to ideas but be firm with my statements.
be more friendly, greet people and get to know others. you know, when we meet someone new at a meeting or conference, i seldom ask for names but just making trivial conversation. although i would not want to invade for any privacy, i should at least make an effort to remember name and faces.
be on time as i hate to wait, therefore i should be assuming that no ones like to wait for others because time is too precious to be spent to wait on someone for too long.
be more understanding, by trying to be on someone else shoes.
be more committed to things i am doing, especially in helping others. i would not want to promise anyone anything but in the end would only be doing it halfheartedly.
be more focus on what i want. by not beating around the bush but to be direct to the point. i should not be assuming that people are able to read my mind. so i should be telling them what i want instead of giving never ending hint.
not to be too greedy with anything. because what we get, we need to share, i.e. money, knowledge, food, etc.

Ho Ho Ho

2008-12-24T19:32:00.002-05:00

Ho ho ho reminds me of my former employees, the two big guys from turkey who look like Santa Claus. they used to say "ho ho ho" quite often and i don't really remember why it was said. it was fun working there and the pay was more than ok [8 dollars/hours] and i often got extra when it was a really busy night. the business itself was very efficient, during the peak hours, 4 pm - 8 pm there were only 3 workers, 2 cooks and 1 waiter who will do whatever not related to cooking. and after 8 pm there would be only 1 cook and 1 waiter to wait for the closing of the restaurant at 11 pm. the food i like because it was tastier than anything else in the area. the service as some customer would say it quite slow because most of the main dishes will be cooked only when ordered. these include all sorts of kebab, chicken curry, lamb chop and pizzas. but it was worth the wait because no food will be served unless it was ready to be eaten. there were many regular customers who keep coming back to the restaurant and they always come a bit earlier than anyone else bacause they know that the restaurant will be packed with people eventually.

being the waiter was pretty tough during the peak hours, as there were orders to take, plates to wash, tables to set, dishes to deliver and etc. but when it was quiet, i would cook for myself. [the waiters are only permitted to cook for the themselves and never for the customers, as they never received any sort of training and for the purpose of upholding the good reputation] i would often cook something not in the menu by mixing all the raw ingredients. the favorite of all is putting the meat on top of the rice with sprinkle of mozarella cheese on top and heat it in the oven until the cheese melt to perfection. i believe, there is a similar menu as this at pizza hut but it is a bit pricey while the proportion is small.

i miss working in the restaurant but at the same glad for not having to work there anymore because it was rather tiring coming home after 11pm only to face bunch of friends who were waiting for the extra food that i will bring home from the restaurant. =P but i was ok with it.

don't be mad, babe

2008-12-13T09:35:00.004-05:00

to be angry is human nature. it is normal to be angry at some things. but the coolest person is the one who is able to control his or her anger - not to show it in a way that will only tarnish his or her reputation. it is also the sign of maturity. the most matured person is not the eldest, but the coolest who is able to withstand any form of challenges with steady mind, which i dearly respect. luckily for me, most of my colleagues are cool!

don't lose your cool. chill babe.

tribute to Nelson

2008-11-29T20:28:00.003-05:00

i do not miss nelson, but i hope that one day i will casually meet him, then to greet and thank him for everything he had taught me.

he taught me that it's ok to be scolded in front of everyone, to be scrutinized and to be laughed at. it's ok because people at higher ranking don't have time to think about the felings of others. it's ok because we learnt it the hard way. it's ok because someone is pointing out the mistakes that we made and not let us fall into the drain.

he taught me that not all bosses are technically competent. sometimes, there are things that the bosses did not know and will accept whatever we say. but never to make assumptions or pull figures from air without any concrete explanations. better still is to have citations or references from reliable sources. it's ok to assume because we do not know everything. and no one has ever written everything that is possible to know on earth. because each and everyday we will be encountering new things, new problems that need new solutions. in order to come up with new solution is to make assumptions on several things.

he taught me that most people are judgemental to the covers of books. impressions are important, make yourself look busy eventhough we may not at that time. make yourself smell good eventhough you have not taken a shower since forever. make yourself look articulate when explaining things eventhough you don't know everything. make yourself humble and prepare to ask opinions from others. someone who is smart on the outside may not be smart on the brain. but most people will perceive it that way if show yourself as being smart. you don't have to know everything to be smart but sufficient knowledge about general things are important. so read, all kind of things.

he taught me that shit happens and we just have to accept the fact we may not succeed all the time. shit happens but you shall not shit on others. be humble and be calm.

he may not be the favorite among students, but he taught me well.